Good Morning. Hello. How are you? #1582
Happy Abriction day. Winter Egg auction. Crappy school software. Mysterious asphalt.
Good morning good morning happy Friday how exciting I am Ready For The Weekend, as the… hrm you know what? I distinctly recall an 80’s one hit wonder named Ready for the Weekend, but the internet is telling me I am mistaken. All I find on Googling it is the Calvin Harris song. Weird.
Oh. Never mind. I am thinking of “I’m Ready for the Weekend” by my arch-nemesis Rick Webb.
Mmkay what do I have to do today, let us see. No meetings today! Nice. Gotta review this job description for a new position at work. Gotta pay the fence guy and the electrician for work on the storage facility. Probably need to bring a check out to the job site. Gotta take the recycling and the trash to the collection center, pick up my prescriptions, maybe swing by Walmart. Gotta file my taxes, been stalling for a K1 but I don’t think that thing is coming. Gotta do a Lowes order for studio work this weekend. What a day, what a day.
Just did the Lowe’s order for good measure. Need more Safe N Sound and Type-X Sheetrock.
Oh man oh man. I can feel distractions coming on. Focus, Rick. You can do this.
Join the GMHHAY slack! Reply to this email and ask for an invite if you’re a human who likes chatting with other humans about topics such as these within!
We are listening to our Spotify Release Radar forgive me father I have sinned. Not super excited about it so far. Gave me “Opalite,” like it’s not a week old. Middling new Geese and Guided by Voices and Cate Le Bon so far.
But more excitingly! There is a new album today by the masters of black metal shoegaze Abriction oh my god I love them, her, so much. Solo project of a woman named Meredith Salvatori. Other than the fact that she’s from the Bronx, I don’t know anything about her but my god I love her music. This is her… checks notes… eighteenth album and I have listened to as many of them as I can track down, mainly on her Bandcamp. Sadly she only has two pieces of vinyl, the masterful Banshee and, and! A new ep! Well, a first vinyl pressing of an EP that came out last year. That just arrived at my house last night! Double Abriction day! I am so excited.
Also I want you to look at the font on the back of this record. It is so bitmap/Stylewriter/1992 I love it so much oh my god.
Question for you. A mystery that has been haunting the Webb family for a few weeks now. Why are these perfect rectangles resurfaced in new asphalt outside of the Taco Bell? I can think of no good reason for it. Jane has decided they are helpful mini-speedbumps to keep you from hitting the building. And, you know, since I can’t think of a single, logical, alternative explanation, I have to assume she is right.
Longtime readers — and listeners to my ill-fated, ill-advised, but quite engaging podcast, which ran for 132 Noble Pedestrian Domestic episodes — will recall my obsession with Fabergé Eggs. Well I have good news for the Fabergé Egg stans out there. This has been dark times, what with the recent sale of Fabergé to an (apparent) tech bro. But now! Exciting news! The Winter Egg is going up for auction! Estimated to fetch £20 million! No fear!
Maybe we should place a bid.
Of course, Russia has been trying to reclaim as many eggs as it can. Ten of the 46 surviving imperial eggs are in the Kremlin Armory. Another nine are in a Fabergé museum in St Petersburgh, owned by Putin-bro Oligarch Viktor Vekelsberg. He also owns 2 Kelch eggs and four other eggs. Neither Russia nor Vekelsberg can bid, I believe, in this upcoming auction, owing to sanctions. Not 100% sure of this, but I assume so. So this raises the question of Putin strong-arming some non-sanctioned Russian Oligarch to buy it and make a donation for the good of the country. Since, you know, Putin can’t afford it these days har har. The third largest collection is in Richmond, VA, weirdly enough, in the Virginia Museum of Fine Arts. Wonder if they have a spare £20 million. The English crown owns 3, I suppose they have money.
$10 says it goes to a tech bro trying to pretend they have taste.
The auction is December 2. Tune in to find out.
There’s some “Pledge-a-thon” at Jane’s school, god knows what that is. You gotta sign up in the single worst piece of software in history, Signup Genius. And then they get points or some shit I don’t know. Emma took care of it and signed up and donated some money to get everyone off our backs.
Only it didn’t work, and Jane’s teacher gave out rewards for kids who signed up, and Jane didn’t get one, and she came home incredibly distraught. Apparently there was an error that timed out when Emma signed up or something. It got sorted. But WTF man, I don’t need the school shaming my daughter for not signing up for their charity events. Leave that hit to the parents. Grr.
Tried to talk to her about it this morning and she was like “oh yeah yeah yeah it’s fine there was an error mommy fixed it” but you could tell it had upset her! She is over it, but…
The amount of cognitive load you have to expend figuring out the, like, four different shitty software platforms that the school uses is absurd. ClassDojo, Power School, Signup Genius, I am forgetting at least two I cannot take this shit.
NOT A FAN.
Shoegaze playlist today. All new except Flying Saucer Attack. Although coincidentally I did recently take delivery of the Flying Saucer Attack/Jessica Baliff collaboration on Kranky, Clear Horizon it is very good. But that is not on here. We put Dan Meyer back-to-back with his band Agriculture, neither known for their shoegaze, but I think they both fit. Very excited to see them later this month. And I’m very into this Slow Quit band they are great. Quality classic shoegaze.
All right have a lovely weekend back Monday to regale you with tales of, yes, that’s right, studio construction and Walmart.
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Thanks for reading.
And hey! Maybe buy one of my books!
Good Morning, Hello, How Are You vol 1.