Past updates
I went out this morning into pleasant sunshine, a breeze, heat without much humidity, to pick up some refills from my pharmacy. I walked into a little street festival: two and a half blocks of thrift and vintage clothes, neighborhood restaurants offering specials, ceramics, teas, perfumes, jewelry, stones and crystals… in short, a delightful mix of stuff I like.
After picking up my meds, I went wandering up and down the street, looking at stuff, some things from a distance and others up close. I didn’t bother looking too closely at all the clothing vendors, as they weren’t likely to have plus-sized items; besides, I have to be in a rare and unique headspace to feel like shopping for clothes, and that only occurs a few times a year. But every booth that had “crystals” seemed to call to me, whether or not I could tell what they were selling from a distance; I admired a lot of pottery; and I bought a small ring, gold set with a sphere of fluorite. It’s been well over ten years since I wore a ring on either hand.
I finally bought a couple of incredible-looking pastries and went home, and apologized to my bird Sunny for taking longer than I had anticipated. But it was a wonderful experience, good for my stupid mental health, as we say on Tumblr, and eating the pastries (a croissant with creme filling and a chocolate chip cookie) practically gave me a religious experience.
I’ve been feeling a lot better than I did in the early part of this year, when I first started this newsletter. I didn’t want to write about how miserable I felt, how tired I was of looking for some kind of satisfaction in religion, how ambivalent I felt about the possibility of retiring. I would much rather tell you about an unexpected street festival, a bird sighting, a book I loved, why Hozier is the most important musician in my life.
So let me round up for you some of what I’ve been reading and listening to.
Reading:
The Lord of the Rings. I first read LOTR when I was nine or ten years old; it’s possible I haven’t re-read it since around the time the Jackson movies came out. Re-reading it now, I fell in love with it again, feeling the power of Tolkien’s writing (I will fight anyone who calls it “boring”) and getting a message I desperately needed: Hope. Keep hoping. Keep working for the good, keep working together for the good, no matter how different from you your allies appear to be. Hope has the power to enable change.
The Ocean at the End of the Lane. I’ve watched or listened to a number of excellent adaptations of Neil Gaiman’s work, but except for a couple volumes of Sandman, I’d never read any of his work. Then someone on Tumblr mentioned that his series for Masterclass is available on Hoopla. I watched the first two or three episodes, and was so intrigued by what he said about this book that I borrowed it and began to read it. And was very soon terrified, in a way that I hadn’t been for a very long time. Not in the way that I’ve sometimes been as an adult, watching a scary movie or reading other horror novelists. I was horrified in the way that I used to feel when I was lying in bed at night, and I could hear the tv on downstairs; The Andromeda Strain was on, and as the movie drew to its end, I was sure, every time—it was on more than once—that the world would really end. This book shows you the horror of a child witnessing something and knowing their parents will never believe it, it’s outside any reality they can accept, and therefore the grown-ups cannot help, and the child is alone. And thus I must either be very very angry at Neil Gaiman or read more of his books.
Listening to:
Hozier, of course. His song “Too Sweet”, released on the Unheard EP, has become his first #1 hit since his debut, “Take Me to Church”. I had a ticket for a show near me, but I wasn’t able to get there, unfortunately; I sold my ticket the day before the show and hope that whoever bought it had a great time. But I’ve participated in his current tour vicariously through the many photographs and videos from his official photographer, Ruth Medjber, and from fans. He has been at once more relaxed and more charismatic, somehow, than on his last tour (when I saw him twice), joking with the audience, telling them odd facts about bees (he keeps beehives at home in Ireland), and gladly sharing the stage with opener Allison Russell and other performers. His joy in sharing his music is, genuinely, a continuing inspiration to me to do my own creative work and share it.
Feather Summarizes the Silmarillion, a somewhat misleadingly named podcast offered through Patreon. Feather summarizes, explains, comments on, reads from, and zooms off on tangents from Tolkien’s posthumously published history of the First Age, entertainingly so. I’m listening to it for a second time as I re-read The Silmarillion in follow-up to LOTR.
In conclusion, you might have noticed that I’ve rebranded a bit: I’ve renamed this newsletter after my favorite Tarot card, the Nine of Pentacles, and changed the formatting a bit. In the familiar Rider-Waite deck drawn by Pamela Colman Smith, the Nine of Pentacles depicts a richly dressed woman with a medieval air, lounging in an enclosed garden with just the company of her pet hawk or falcon, hooded and settled on her hand. That’s me and my bird in our little studio, right?
Until next time, be well, do good, make good art (as Neil Gaiman says), love to all.
Rembrandt's wife is Merri-Todd Webster