Nov. 20, 2024, 6:38 a.m.
"I am so scared of next time I give birth" - Your Postpartum Stories
Sharing your postpartum voice - November 2024
Postpartum Matters
Don’t forget that our next Community Connection Circle is this Sunday, at 7pm. Catch the Zoom link here.
Thank you for joining me in this space where we come together to share and honour the powerful stories of postpartum experiences. I’m Sophie, and I work closely with Zoe - the founder and director of Postpartum Matters CIC - and together we’re passionate advocates for women’s health and well-being. In this monthly segment, I’m privileged to share the voices of women who have opened up about their journeys— their stories are filled with pain, resilience, and strength.
You can read all of the previous posts, and catch up on the entire series here:
Since starting this series, I've been moved by the hundreds of narratives we've received, each one shining a light on the often overlooked realities of postpartum care. Today, I’m sharing some of these stories with you. They’re not just about motherhood but about the broader experience of womanhood, encompassing the silent struggles and remarkable courage that often accompany it.
If you have your own story to share, I warmly invite you to contribute. You can use this Google form to share as much or as little as you feel comfortable with.
As you read, please take care of yourself. Some of these experiences are intense, but it’s by acknowledging them that we can start pushing for the changes that are so urgently needed in postpartum care.
If you find value in these posts and the work we’re doing, we’d be deeply grateful for your support. Your contributions help keep this newsletter going and also fund the free, daily support we provide through The Women’s Health Hub. Consider becoming a paid subscriber here or making a one-off contribution here. Every bit of support helps us continue this important work.
Let’s explore these stories together…
“I think there needs to be better referral to specialist support outside of the midwifery service where necessary - for example I needed to see a gynaecologist and also a physiotherapist and it was difficult to get the right referral from my gp at the 6 week check. Really need a full postpartum ’MOT’ like they do in France and pelvic floor physio /support as standard.”
“Nobody checked my stitches, not even at my 6 week GP checkup. This seems ridiculous to me. I am so scared of next time I give birth, having complications and not healing.”
“Midwifery led care is very important but so is the role of other community care workers such as HV and GP. The current role of HVs is redundant and should be replaced.”
“More information and support for mums about postpartum as a whole. No information about possible birth trauma (physical and mental), no support or information on what to expect in postpartum and what is "normal" and what isn't. No information was given about:
- Signs of wound infection, what is normal pain and what you should flag to the midwife/GP.
- signs of prolapse and how long bladder weakness can last after birth
- diastasis recti. It wasn't even mentioned, let alone checked.
-faqs, such as sex after having stitches/giving birth. How long it takes for your uterus to shrink. Saggy skin, normalising postpartum bodies.
- what's normal hormones and what's PND.”
“I had a postpartum bleed in recovery following my section which required the crash team to save me. This was not noted on my notes in any way other than the volume of blood lost, no mention of my dangerously low bp or the numerous things I was injected with. On the maternity ward I was refused oramorph on day 2, I was sporadically given my meds and treated like I was being a pain when I cried or demanded pain relief. I couldn’t stand, bend and was constantly faint from anaemia. My hubby was refused entry after leaving to look after our son and I was alone for 5 days. Not once was my wound checked, my two IVs were filthy, uncovered and one was not bunged.
At home my wound was checked once, it broke down at one end, my mental health went bad again yet I was still discharged. I felt abandoned by the teams I’d had throughout my pregnancy and had no one to turn to.”
“In established labour, I was told I was fully dilated and effaced, but the baby was distressed on the monitor, so I pushed my 8lb baby out in just over 1 minute. Turned out I wasn’t fully dilated and tore my cervix so badly that I lost 2 litres of blood and ended up in the emergency theatre. After the operation to stitch me back up internally and externally, they told me it would take at least 12 months for my cervix to heal, and that it would be left incompetent and I’d struggle to stay pregnant should I want another baby. I was discharged at 10 days, with no follow ups, no advice, just left to deal with it all. My baby is only 3 months old but the reality is now settling in but I have no one to talk to.”
Thank you for taking the time to engage with these stories today. Each one is a reminder of the gaps in postpartum care and the urgent need for better support systems. These aren’t just stories—they’re a call to action for all of us.
If you or someone you know is struggling postnatally, I encourage you to seek out support. The Women’s Health Hub offers a range of free resources and events to help guide you through this time. You can check out our timetable of events here. Even if the solution isn’t straightforward, we’re here to provide a safe space for you.
There are also other incredible organisations like Make Birth Better, The Birth Trauma Association, and Know Your Floors that offer crucial support. Additionally, you can make your voice heard by contacting your local MP to advocate for better postpartum care. Find out how to reach your MP here.
If these stories resonated with you, please consider sharing this post by ‘restacking’ it, or forwarding it to others who might benefit from or contribute to the conversation. Together, we can raise awareness and push for the changes that are so needed.
Your support, whether through subscribing, sharing, or simply reading, means the world to us. Thank you for being part of this journey.
Until next time,
