You are your habits
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View this email in your browser (|ARCHIVE|) “Perfection is not a prerequisite for anything but pain.” ―Tara Brach
We are all creatures of habit.
The ones we choose for ourselves—whether it’s to start or stop doing something—shape the outcomes we can expect to achieve as a creative pro.
It applies to your personal life, too.
Given that habits are so central to who we are, why then are they so hard to make stick—especially if it involves something we enjoy doing?
I like the way Gretchen Rubin answers that question in her book, Better Than Before (https://www.amazon.ca/dp/B00NDTS5MK/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1&_encoding=UTF8&tag=thinkitcrea0a-20&linkCode=ur2&linkId=610c99447b888be9675d49e247cc69b4&camp=15121&creative=330641) : Mastering the Habits of Our Everyday Lives.
She argues that we “build our habits only on the foundation of our own nature.”
Whether we’re trying to change or reinforce a behaviour, it comes down to how we look at two kinds of expectations: the inner ones we set for ourselves and the outer ones we set in relation to others.
Out of that habit framework, she maintains there are four kinds of people:
- Upholders: They meet both outer and inner expectations.
- Rebels: They resist both outer and inner expectations.
- Questioners: They resist outer expectations but meet inner ones.
- Obligers: They meet outer expectations but resist inner ones.
Which one are you? I’m firmly in the Obliger group.
The habit-making solution that works best for people like me is to have external accountability. It’s why I’m in the deadlines business. Without that structure, things just don’t get done predictably or as well as they need to be.
Whichever group you fall into, the positive habits you choose for yourself are not about being perfect in your execution.
The achievement is in the fact that you’re doing something and doing it repeatedly.
The most meaningful changes are the ones you makel (https://us4.campaign-archive.com/?u=89226eb68936fc712577977b8&id=35bf935570) ittle by little (https://us4.campaign-archive.com/?u=89226eb68936fc712577977b8&id=35bf935570) every day.
Whether that’s making a habit of reading for pleasure every day (congratulations if you do this: it puts you in a top one percent of one percent of people), getting daily exercise, making your bed (https://us4.campaign-archive.com/?u=89226eb68936fc712577977b8&id=983dfddd98) , updating your budget, conducting follow-ups with clients, or just spending time chatting with your partner while making dinner together…you are your habits.
Make yours work for you.
Very best, Patrick
P.S. This week’s CreativeBoost is an experiment. I’m sending it on a Monday rather than on the usual Sunday schedule. What do you think, |NAME|? Is it better for you to start your week, or to finish the weekend with this? Let me know.
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