Brief Gifts
Tl;dr: I’m sending 5 pairs of briefs I tie-dyed to people who would find them gender-affirming. Read on for how this came about and how to request <3
The day of tie-dying at the family reunion, there was a run to the nearest big box store for white t-shirts for those who had forgotten to bring their own. I didn’t, in fact, need another t-shirt - but I had been running low on reliable underwear. My top drawer has gotten hella holey, shrunken, and slackened. (Metaphor for life? Nah but lol.)
So I pushed through the awkwardness of texting one of my partner’s cousins about the exact right cut of underwear while she was live in the big box store aisle. She came back with a perfect pack: 6 pairs of men’s size small, plain white with an inch-wide gray waistband; not Hanes - the beloved - but some equally acceptable generic brand. Meanwhile, the designated family tie-dying expert had laid a tarp out on the front lawn and was guiding everyone from the 2-year-olds to the 72-year-olds in the process. I got to tying and binding on my tighty whiteys, leaning mostly cool colors with a touch of warm.
And a couple days later, we all saw the fruits of our labor. My briefs looked good! Blue bulls-eyes, thick green and purple stripes, mottled red, chaotic orange-yellow. Nothing perfect, everything excellent.
But then, the moment of truth: I tried them on, and they were too small. Not literally too small to get on, but just uncomfortably tight. And one thing we know is that this world is too far gone for us to keep our Jennys aka genitals bound up like an overstuffed carry-on that really should be getting the checked-bag treatment.
(Unless you’re into that, of course. Friction, restriction, sausage casing vibes, the erotic challenge of the zipper fight...there's definitely something spicy there, no doubt about it.)
(By the way: Grace had tried to tell me I should round up size-wise based on recent past experience buying underwear packs, but listen, it’s hard to know!! You can’t exactly try them on in advance, and they can just as easily end up baggy around the lower booty as tight around the waist.)
Even though they're not destined for my ass, I love these briefs. They were my first tie-dye, or at least the first one I remember in a very long time. They're colorful, they're intended-upon if also somewhat random, they're brand new. Before, they were just a half-dozen mass-produced unethically-made cotton-elastic garments that came out of a plastic sleeve from a big box store in upstate New York. And now they're still that, but also somehow something more. I want them to have a life - to slowly disperse their fibers and loosen their elastic grip one year after the next while embracing the pelvis of someone who feels a soft flow of relief and contentment each time they tug these kiddos out of the top drawer.
Because underwear is not just incidental. For many people, and gender expansive folks in particular, it can be a powerful site of meaning, contradiction, and possibility: commonplace yet emotionally charged, aspirational yet mundane, invisible yet important; an opportunity to seek or test or express some essence of ourselves, while maintaining some privacy as we do so. And whereas cis culture would have us treat underwear as one more opportunity to subconsciously accomplish the successful performance of our gender assigned at birth, a trans experience of underwear can be one of choice-making, intentionality, pleasure, relaxation, wiggly eyebrows, auto-flattery, and generally wide-ranging self-determination.
These briefs, the ones I tie-dyed, are a style of underwear that I've often turned to and found a home in. If they can be a brightened version of that for others who know what I'm talking about, that would make me happy.
So here’s the deal: I’m looking for a handful of folks to whom I can gift a pair of these lovely tie-dyed-by-yours-truly briefs - trans masc folks especially, as well as anyone who would find them gender-affirming.
What to know and how this will work:
As stated above, they are listed as a men’s size small. Not that you need to be able to wear them if that is not your size! They could just be “art.”
To be transparent, I did try one pair on and try to make it work for like half a day, but that pair and all others will be delivered fresh, clean, and functionally brand new.
I dyed 6 pairs but have 5 left to give (one is already spoken for).
No color requests.
I don’t have a plan if more than 5 people respond to this unusual offering, and appreciate folks’ understanding in advance if I don't send you one.
To request: reply to this email!
If one lands with you: I’ll ask for a mailing address and will ship your briefs to you by the end of September. I’d ask that you send me some sort of picture showing the briefs once you receive them - doesn’t have to be a selfie wearing them or something super intimate like that (although that’s cool too!) but just a pic that can help me track an archive if I do more of these.
And yah, I might do more of these on purpose depending on how this unexpected round goes. Encouragement welcome there if you feel it :) Additionally, I realize "small" is not a particularly inclusive size/range; if I make more of these beyond accidentally wandering into doing so and having them not fit me either, that'll change.
Does this plan make any sense? Not sure. Will anyone want them? You tell me. Is this a weird version of regifting that calls to mind awkward family gift exchanges of yore? Perhaps. Does this count as creative practice and should I reference it in my artist statement as a trajectory that also links The Amtraklor and gay boots raffle mania? TBD. For now, hit me up if you feel these are for you.
Big shoutout to Jael for teaching me and the rest of the crew how to tie-dye. Everyone else: thanks for reading, as always. I'll look out for your #briefappeals soon.