#131 Garlic isn’t even a fruit
Words. Watermelons. Woy Janik.
Issue #131 Garlic isn’t even a fruit
11th September 2024
Can you do too much improv?
My spirit says no but my body is currently saying yes.
Also, this made me laugh.
It captures my relationship with Radio perfectly and it even looks a bit like both of us.
Rule of one?
[Games] Suika clones (a story)
Cherry. Strawberry. Grape. Dekopon. Persimmon. Apple. Pear. Peach. Pineapple. Melon. Watermelon.
It all started with Watermelon Drop.
That was the inciting incident. And what kept us playing was the fact that Jennifer Jordan had achieved TWO watermelons, which didn’t seem possible.
We spent hours on our phones trying to beat her score. Dropping digital fruit into a digital bag. Celebrating when two fruit of the same kind touched and merged into a slightly bigger fruit. Crazy days.
But then I started to get that itch, you know? Something was ... off. The game didn’t scale onto my iPhone screen quite right. And the fruit weren’t even in size order. Bananas are way bigger than bulbs of garlic in real life. And garlic isn’t even a fruit.
I smelled bulls%*t.
So, I did what I did best. I went looking for trouble.
I started researching the game. And turned over a few (peach) stones. It wasn’t even that hard to find. Just sitting there in blue, red, orange and green on Google.
Watermelon Drop was a clone. A cheap knock off of the original game.
But what was the original game? That’s where it got interesting.
To find my prince, I had to kiss a few frogs.
Merge Fruit eschewed the cute fruit aesthetic but added an interesting tilt command. Fruit Merge was big and beautiful but got the physics all wrong. And the less said about Watermelon Merge the better.
Finally, I found it. Suika had been developed by Japanese projector manufacturers AladdinX and came pre-installed on their machines. When they ported the game to the Japanese Switch store, it was picked up by a bunch of streamers and had gone super viral. Hence the clones.
I typed the name Suika into my UK Switch with sweaty palms. Would it be available in my country? A moment later, and there it was, waiting for me and on sale for the princely sum of £2.69. I downloaded it immediately.
So now, I have the original. And it’s ... great. It’s really charming and well made. I like it a lot.
But sometimes, I miss the chaos of Watermelon Drop. The tiny bananas with the physical density of a collapsing star. The clash command that can end the game if you use it too much.
And that’s when I realise, I still haven’t achieved two watermelons like Jennifer Jordan ...
Spotlight
One of the things I want to do with The Pretend Company is bring over the very best improv teachers I meet internationally and (re-)introduce them to UK improvisers.
Roy Janik is amongst my absolute favourite human beings and I’m so excited to offer a couple of workshops with him on Sunday 29th September. I don’t know anyone with more experience of narrative improv. I learned virtually everything I know about the subject from him (and not just me, he’s also taught Steve Roe, Maria Peters, Jinni Lyons - his narrative intensives were a who’s who of UK improv talent back in the day). Basically, he’s the improviser I want to be when I finally Pokémon-evolve into my next improv form.
I recommend you take these classes without hesitation. You will have a lot of fun and you will learn tonnes.
He’s agreed to teach the following:
Chase the Ball, 10am-1pm, Sunday, 29th September 2024
Both classes will be at the same central London venue (which I’ll confirm as soon as I can) so you can book both and spend a whole day with him.
Longform thoughts
Cereal tells us nothing. Something like Shredded Wheat, for example, gives us information about your character. What kind of person would voluntarily put themselves through the ordeal of eating dry pillows of unsweetened hay? Are they a health junkie or do they perhaps hate themselves at a deeper, more fundamental level?
Back to answering questions from readers this week. Let me be specific about specifics.
Radio contact
Little FLUFFBALL!
P.S. - It turns out Suika isn’t even the original. It’s just a well-made clone that got lucky. It’s actually a remake of a even earlier Chinese game called Synthetic Watermelon. How much deeper does this rabbit hole go?