On being online and having a literal spine
I woke up the other morning with an email draft I must have sent myself in a half-sleep moment of a-ha. All it said was: it’s impossible to have a posture these days. AND BOY HOWDY IS THAT RIGHT. The weight of so many things has given me the posture of a gay shrimp—stress, covid, long-covid, exhaustion, sitting all day sending little emails, physical pain, spiritual pain, you name it! We are all carrying it right now. It is clear. The weight of the world, of capitalism, of war-mongering governments, of pandemic denialism, of fascism and mccarthyism and the censorship that has alway existed for non-white, non-poor and working class people in this country. It’s a lot! And yet… I am still making little jokes and taking my collagen supplements and smiling when my music lines up exactly with the opening of the subway doors.
I often think about what it means to make art, what art is, what arts means when things are exceptionally bad in the world (there’s a genocide in Palestine right now that the US government is funding indiscriminately FYI not sure if you’ve heard!).
I’m in the middle of preparing a show at the end of the month about my memes and internet presence. I have been wrestling with promotion and whether or not to do it and what art means when I feel like a helpless shrimp spined faggot with a full-time job and a ton of medical debt. My memes as miss lady salad are political, sure. They say things, yes. But are they helping? Changing the world? Is any art? I don’t know. I don’t think so. Does that mean they aren’t important or useful? I also don’t know. I think they’ve largely kept me sane and alive and motivated to do things outside of the internet.
Three years ago I committed to make a meme a day, every day for a year. That turned into making one every day for over three years now. The show at the end of the month (ADMIN REVEAL) is a sort of recognition of that. It’s something my Franklin Furnace grant is helping fund. It’s helping me raise money to pay off said medical debt. It’s a brief moment for me to talk about my brain and to yell the rage of what I’ve said in my memes with my mouth. Is this stupid? I don’t know. Is stupid bad? Probably not.
This is a long-winded way of inviting you to join. I have made some really interesting connections through this online work, and I see ADMIN REVEAL as a continuing project that can continue to grow and reach. I hope if you’ve engaged at all with this online performance the past few years, you’ll consider joining for the show. I don’t think it’s weird when URL things become IRL, including connections with people.
I was in my feelies the other day and drafted this portion of the show’s opening. Maybe it'll go in and maybe not, but I’m sharing it here now:
When I conceive of any work, I want it to be an honest reflection of what my limits are. I am performing a show about memes during a genocide. I am making a show while working a full time job living with medical debt and chronic illness. I am making a show with only so much to give. And it’s because of that that you’re going to sit through an hour of whatever the fuck it is I want to serve you.
Lol I promise it will also be funny and gay and make fun of oligarchs.
ADMIN REVEAL
Jan 25-27: 7:30 pm
Jan 27: 2pm
At the Brick AUX - 628 Metropolitan Ave, Brooklyn
as part of the Exponential Festival 2024
Free durational performance Saturday, Jan 27 12:30pm to 2pm
I will sit in front of a meme-ed step and repeat while I catch up on stuff on my phone and laptop. You can come use a selfie stick to take a photo with me (I will ignore you—mommy is busy).
Tickets to shows here
All ticket sales are split between me and the Brick, who does great work for weirdo artists. If money is an issue, email me or use code BRICKIES for $10 tickets xoxoxo