Listening > Talking
First hear, then be heard
Often in our conversations, we're not truly listening.
We're waiting for our turn to speak, busy formulating our response, our counter-argument, our story. Our culture tends to value speaking, having a firm opinion, and making our own voice heard.
What if the most impactful part of a conversation isn't what we say, but how deeply we listen?
Prioritizing listening isn't a passive act of silence. It is mindful and active engagement with another person's reality. It is a conscious choice to step out of our own story to create room for theirs.
When we shift our focus from talking to listening, we can:
- Gain Deeper Understanding: We move beyond our own assumptions and get to experience the world from another's perspective. It's an opportunity to see their "territory," not just our "map" of it.
- Build Stronger Connections: Giving someone our full, undivided attention is a powerful act of compassion. People feel seen and valued when they are truly heard, which is the foundation of trust.
- Learn More Effectively: We can only learn from others when we are truly open to receiving what they have to share. Listening is the doorway to new knowledge and insights.
- Respond More Impactfully: When we listen first, the words we do choose to speak are more relevant, thoughtful, and helpful. We move from reacting automatically to responding mindfully.
This isn't about staying silent, but about changing our default mode from "waiting to talk" to "seeking to understand."
In one of your conversations this week, what if you focused mostly on listening (and asking questions), just to see what you notice about the other person, and about yourself?
Happy listening!
/rajesh