Pandemic Walking

Linda told Toby that coping with lockdown was all about finding a project. She told him to look online at the things people had found to do. Watching all the Star Wars films. Watching all the Bond films. Watching all the Marvel Cinematic Universe films. Watching every film that involves time loops. Watching every film that involves time loops. Watching every film that involves time loops. Watching every film that involves time loops. Learning German on Duolingo, learning Swedish on Duolingo, learning Dothraki on Duolingo. Meeting on Zoom for drinks every Friday, wearing fancy dress every Friday, costumed with things found in the flat every Friday. Writing bucket lists to do once ‘all this’ was over. Filming videos of your perfect family singing gently satirical songs about politics. Making facemasks to give away. Making masks to made people laugh. Crafting candles, crafting quilts, crafting Amazon orders. A single session of daily exercise. The first month, Toby walked to the same place each morning - five thousand steps to the edge of Shoreham Port, five thousand steps back. As March slid into April he ordered a map of Brighton and a black pen. He started by colouring in the streets he knew well around his house. The next day he filled the gaps. A walk to the supermarket added a long tendril to the knots. Calls from friends, checking if he was OK on his own. A daily photo to the boys of things he’d found, like grocers that had taken up residence within a hairdresser, since the salon would not be re-opening for some time. Some people were planning holidays for when it was over. Toby said he would visit Wuhan, because once tourists could go there then it was all over. Friends buying guidebooks as decoys, pandemic distractions. Toby’s sister had once walked the South Downs Way, and Toby planned his own trip. He'd never do it, of course, but the plan bolstered his sanity. He remembered his friend Ellen had written a guidebook, but she didn’t want to talk about it. Work kept him busy, although his seniority meant he couldn’t duck the Zoom quizzes, he had to set an example for the juniors. More lines on his map. The long avenues running back and forth to the sea-front. The tangle of roads round seven dials. For a time, it seemed like a lot of places he could reach with 5,000 steps and back but before long he felt trapped, walking half an hour to fill in a single street he’d missed. A Blake quote on a concrete bollard. Sometimes, when it was early and he had not slept he would take a Sharpie on the walk to hide his name in the city. Sometimes, he walked past empty office blocks at dawn and thought of them as a world passing. Toby had no idea what to do when the map was filled in. He had no idea what came next.

Background

Even more than six years on, the pandemic still feels like unresolved business. A horror movie that we were all trapped in, and we’ve suppressed the trauma rather than deal with it. We’re eager to forget, but that means we learn nothing from what happened.

I took a lot of photos during that time because I wanted to try to remember.

You know how, for a time, Google was hawking photobooks, offering to collect together your best photos into a booklet? It compiled one for me during the pandemic and I paid for a printed copy. Page after page of photos showing empty streets. No parties, no fun, no joy. It’s a weird artefact.

Watching Time Loop movies was something I started doing in 2021. I still watch them when I find an interesting one. It’s a fun project, but nothing like as ambitious as the person who watched Groundhog Day daily for a year.

This story is linked to the South Downs Way ones, but I still need to connect everything together.