January 29, 2024

finding joy 1/29

digging deep

Another Monday has arrived and as I sit down to write my Finding Joy column, I realize last week is a complete blur. It felt like every day featured rain or snow or sometimes a combination of both. We saw very little sun. Just a gloomy winter week where little happened. But I did find some little glimmers of hope and joy within all that bleakness.

Wednesday was a big day. I had three doctor appointments in a row to go over some issues and get on the road to wellness. First I saw my liver doctor, who said my numbers were normal, which is wonderful as they've been elevated for so long. I'll have to stay on meds for the rest of my life, which is fine as long as my liver stays behaving. In the beginning of all this, they were talking about a transplant down the road, and now everything looks so much better. Small victories.

I also saw a nutritionist for my Type 2 Diabetes. This is something I should have done at the outset, two years ago. Instead I just took my Diabetes meds and assumed that would take care of everything. I did nothing to better myself in this regard, and my A1C number was high as hell last test. So now I am testing my glucose 3-4 times a day, eating right, walking around the block every day, and really paying attention to what my numbers tell me. In less than a week of making changes, I got my glucose down to a reasonable average, I feel better, and I lost a pound and a half already. My nutritionist is also setting me up with an endocrinologist so we can change the meds I'm currently on to something with less side effects. This doctor will also help me maintain a Diabetes friendly lifestyle and monitor me frequently so I can keep my numbers down an hopefully eliminate this disease from my life.

So I feel really good about the direction I'm going in. Not only did I take care of myself physically, but I have moved on from past things mentally. On Friday, I scooped up all the video games and movies and movie posters and other assorted sundry that Todd left here, and I put them on Buy Nothing. A half hour later, some dude came and took everything. All the detritus from my marriage is basically gone. I also packed up a lot of clothes I'm not going to wear again and had Big Brothers come pick them up. Little by little I am decluttering my life and my brain. This brings me personal joy because it took me so long to get here and I'm running with it now. Feels good.

I went down a Billy Joel rabbit hole this week. I know what you're thinking. Billy Joel? Don't you dislike him a lot? And I have no good answer for that except I was feeling nostalgic for high school. I listened to The Stranger and then Nylon Curtain and then Turnstiles. I also listened to "Summer, Highland Falls" about twenty times and decided it's one of the prettiest songs ever written. I don't know how long this will last; it might just be a phase, it might be a return to form. Either way, it made me so happy to listen to this music with open ears and an open mind once again. Reminiscing with myself about hanging out at the Village Green in the late 70s and how I danced to "Only the Good Die Young" at my sophomore dance. It's good to reevaluate your prejudices every once in a while. You never know what will come of it.

I don't remember if I talked about this before, but Pixie and Reilly have really taken a liking to watching birds and squirrels on YouTube. There are literally hundreds of YouTube channels that cater to cats. They will sit transfixed in front of my iPad for a good hour or until they fall asleep. Sometimes they paw at the screen but they've definitely learned that there are no actual birds in the house. It is pure joy to watch them watch this thing like a movie. Now I have to teach them about limiting screen time.

Like I said, not much going on this week. I worked two days and came to the conclusion that I really like this job (and that it's only two days a week). I feel lucky. I feel good. Hope you're feeling good, too.