June 3, 2024

Whatever: The Dick Bong News You Need

Update

• In 2020, Microsoft pledged to slash its greenhouse gas emissions. Let's see how that's going.

AI

• A man thought that perhaps the person claiming to be from Facebook customer support was a scammer, so he asked Facebook's AI bot if the number was legitimate. It replied "The phone number… is indeed a legitimate Facebook support number." It wasn't, and he got scammed.

• Google admitted they have no way to make their AI bot stop providing hopelessly inaccurate information, and that they will spend $100 billion on it regardless. Meanwhile, a post from their head of search explained that the bot's responses are garbage because these days Google's search results are garbage. (Want to know why? Here's the backstory.)

• Google isn't completely out of ideas for how to improve its bot, though. They're going to pay $60m a year to let the bot learn from Reddit shitposts. So we can look forward to more amusing Google bot responses.

• Google researchers said most image-based disinformation is now AI-generated.

• OpenAI revealed that Russia and China had used its software in propaganda and disinformation campaigns.

• A study found that 52% of code generated by ChatGPT is wrong.

• Remember that story about GPT-4 passing the bar exam? It turned out that was bullshit.

Politics

• Republicans sued for the right to harass and threaten election workers.

• Trump posted a video imagining his winning the election, mentioning the "creation of a unified reich".

• Trump supporters wore adult diapers to show loyalty to their leader.

• A Minnesota Republican voted against gun safety legislation, saying that on the farm you need a gun ready for use at a moment's notice, lest a cow should "take you down and trample you into dust".

• A study found that disinformation on social networks is disproportionately spread by middle aged white Republican women in Arizona, Florida and Texas.

• A Republican official who claimed the 2020 election was stolen, was found to have voted illegally 9 times.

• Texas Republicans receive a mailer threatening to report them if they fail to vote for Trump.

Sensible decisions

• The UN picked Saudi Arabia to chair its commission on gender equality.

• Someone who bought one of Elon Musk's stupid trucks sliced a wrist open on its sharp edges and ended up in hospital, but said "otherwise, it’s great".

• A California man was arrested for taking a severed human leg from a railway accident scene and eating it.

Business

• Boeing's CEO got $24.8m last year for ruining the company — plus his $44m pension.

• Microsoft introduced a terrible new feature to record everything ever displayed on your computer screen in a searchable database.

• Construction companies are becoming unwilling to work for SpaceX, because the company doesn't pay its bills.

• Exxon Mobil sued its own shareholders to get them to shut up about global warming.

• A passenger on an American Airlines flight complained about a Black passenger smelling bad — so AA ejected eight Black male passengers from the flight.

• Erisco Foods, makers of Nagiko Tomato Mix, got upset about people calling its product sugary.

Nature

• A truck carrying 15 million bees crashed.

• A cat received an honorary doctorate from Vermont State University.

• Is that a small pink snake in your pants or are you just glad to see me?

And finally

• Canada's strategic maple syrup reserve hit a 16 year low.

• A plane flown by World War II flying ace Dick Bong was found in New Guinea.

• Researchers found a way to shine LEDs on road signs to make them invisible to self-driving vehicles.

• At last, a chance to buy your own flamethrower-wielding robot dog!