The Weekly Whatever: Sleng Teng Riddim
- 2022 omen watch: NJ groundhog day canceled after the groundhog drops dead.
Preventative measures
-
Finally there’s a vaccine to prevent Kid Rock.
-
California town declares itself a mountain lion habitat so that it won’t have to allow multi-family housing units or build more housing.
UK news
-
Traditional British sayings like “as cold as a witch’s tit” are at risk of dying out, and nobody says “pip pip!” when saying goodbye any more.
-
UK government to fight energy cost crisis by lending everyone £200 to pay their utility bills, then collecting the money back over the next 5 years.
Political discourse
-
National Butterfly Center closes after QAnon followers claim it’s a front for a sex trafficking ring.
-
US Rep. Thomas Massie shares quote from pedophile neo-Nazi on Twitter.
-
Biden administration decides to keep Trump’s policy of rapid deportation of migrants, because COVID.
-
US government prepares to deploy robot dogs at the border, will be watching the rest of Black Mirror for more great ideas.
-
Republicans in 7 states sent fake electoral vote certificates to try to keep Trump in power in 2019.
Billionaire watch
-
Jeff Bezos to have Holland dismantle a historic 1927 bridge so that his ugly superyacht can squeeze past.
-
Teenager builds bot to track where billionaires’ private jets are flying. Elon Musk tries to bribe him to take it down.
-
Zuckerberg tells Facebook to pivot to video, since that worked so well last time.
Crapto
-
OpenSea says more than 80% of the NFTs created for free in its marketplace are fraud or spam.
-
Gold cube allegedly worth $11.7m is placed in Central Park under guard, as part of a promo for NFTs.
Miscellany
-
White-on-white crime: Argument over mayonnaise leads to truck-based killing, life sentence.
-
Amazon sells food preservative to people using it for suicide. The algorithm helpfully starts suggesting other useful suicide tools to shoppers.
-
Build-a-Bear Group launches new series of horny teddy bears.
Suggested reading
-
How Australia’s Nazis got away with it.