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April 25, 2020

The Weekly Whatever: Lysoltini over ice

Quote of the week

“I was thinking this morning, and this is just kind of a thought experiment because I was thinking about this — why don’t we just put everybody in a space outfit or something like that? No. Seriously, I mean—”

— Stephen Moore, Trump administration economic adviser.

Woodpecker engineering

  • Demand for face masks crashes Internet-connected air conditioners.

  • Internet-connected baby crib hacked to play loud music and shake your baby.

Wait, what?

  • Old McDonalds had some sheep.

  • COVID-19 vaccine to be developed using the blood of Tom Hanks.

Threat Level Orange

  • New racist takes over as spokesman for Department of Health and Human Services.

Well, fancy that!

  • Republican-led Senate intelligence committee unanimously endorses report concluding that yes, Russia conducted a campaign to interfere in the 2016 elections and get Trump elected.

  • Amazon said it doesn’t use merchant data to target its own competing products; that was a lie.

Sick, sad world

  • Woman shot in chest saved by breast implants.

  • As the pandemic continues, spare a thought for the poor bedbugs.

  • Gathering of the Juggalos canceled but Georgia Governor reopening businesses even faster than Trump thinks is safe.

  • Skateboard park filled with sand to encourage social distancing; dirt bikers show up.

  • “How Transforming My Apartment Into an Indoor Farm Turned Into a Very Bad Idea”.

  • Death Stranding player spends 15 hours trying to write his name in the snow.

This should end well

  • Pandemic tracking to be handled by Palantir.

Actual good news

  • You’re not going back to normal open-plan office life for a long, long time.

  • Antibody tests suggest that millions of people may have had the SARS-CoV-2 coronavirus and not even realized.

  • NYC coronavirus stats finally improve.

Going viral

  • Chloroquine study cut short, as primary outcome is death.

  • Makers of Lysol say please don’t listen to Trump and inject yourself with bleach.

  • “Man Who Died Ingesting Fish Tank Cleaner Remembered as Intelligent, Levelheaded Engineer“

  • Group of scientists and politicians proposes deliberately infecting people with coronavirus to test vaccines on them.

  • Pandemic task force was led by big pharma executive and labradoodle breeder.

  • Hydroxychloroquine increases deaths from COVID-19 in new study.

  • Sean Hannity associated with increased risk of coronavirus death.

  • Michigan senator wears confederate flag mask at state capitol.

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