Slow and steady, said the tortoise to the hare
(Blair Road, 2018) Someone asked me what I find joy in, and I think my answer is unequivocally walking, observing, and drawing.
Sit with your feelings
For a person who still finds it difficult to spend time by and with myself (outdoors), it's no wonder the act of "sitting with my feelings" feels so foreign. But unpacking this New Age phrase (as some may find it so), it’s essentially the slowdown of feeling to thought to action, separating what we think from what we feel, because any knee-jerk reaction emerging from the swirl of emotion can sometimes overwhelm, instead of addressing the situation factually, and at a detached distance. It is hard. I'm still trying.
Feel your feelings, know that the waves that hit you will ebb, and if there is spare energy, approach your feelings with curiosity.
From feelings, let me move on to thinking. We tend to look externally for entertainment, whereas this suggestion brings a fresh approach in asking if we could practise intentionally thinking thoughts that are pleasurable. As the writer notes, "the thoughts we create shape the lives we live, hence it is to our benefit to occasionally spend some time thinking for pleasure."
Your process is yours to own
This graphic from @resetnyc explains so much about grief. It doesn't discredit the amount of grief you feel; it shows you the journey that grief takes alongside the time that passes.
Your process is yours to own. I may heal faster than you, or you may heal faster than me, but it is okay to hold that grief as a reminder inside you, that there was love, there was joy, there was immeasurable sadness, and that you are here, right now.
Thank you for being brave
In the past 48 hours, I have been:
Listening to: GIRIBOY's It Was Love, 2PM's My House, Ace of Base's All That She Wants
Reading: Daniel H Pink's When, Euny Hong's The Power of Nunchi
Watching: Binged The Veil across the weekend, and it was good! Action-packed thrillers need to be 12 episodes or less to make sense, else you're inviting unnecessary spanners.
p.s. I tried a hip-hop lesson last Thurs and my knees were so ded
Medhā