psychedelic homecoming
i feel at home in the tenderness ♡
just before climbing into bed with my mushroom friends for a day of gratitude + grief
9/11/24
Dear Community ♡
Do you ever have moments where you look around at your life and wonder "whoa, how did I get here?”
Maybe you don’t….but I’ve had a lot of these moments, and it’s been an interesting access point to self-reflection - in some deeper and some more surfacey ways.
Like yeah, always the deep…but also, I like to revisit those possibly unassuming moments that ended up nudging me in a direction, turning me onto something that would become a bigger part of my life later down the road.
This inquiry has shown up a lot in regard to my psychedelic practice.
I’ve been holding space for entheogenic experiences for 6 years now, with 21 years behind me of personal exploration of my own expanded states.
I was 17 when I ate my first mushrooms in 2003, so obviously this would technically fit into the ‘recreational’ category in this modern age of recreational vs therapeutic.
For the record: I believe very much in “recreational” experiences having just as much healing potential as a more structured therapeutic healing session with a guide. More on that later in a future letter.
But let’s go back to 17 year old Mari…I was nervous of course!! but I deeply trusted my friend who invited me into my first mushroom journey. It was tender, it was sacred, it was intimate.
I don’t have a very strong memory in general, but I can feel back into the essence of that experience, and when I do I feel warm, safe and loved.
Who knew…that that experience would open a door for me that would expand into a professional practice that gives me the opportunity to return to the tender compassionate space where I feel so at home.
In a world of “so muchness” and a society that often doesn’t feel like it was wielded from the heart, I feel so at home in spaces that are soft, loving, gentle and kind.
That first journey had no other intention other than “have a new experience” in a container and with a person with whom I felt safe to open.
I am deeply grateful that I had all my “recreational” experience behind me when I entered into more intentional therapeutic medicine work, because this gave me a great foundation for embracing each journey as it comes. I do not put pressure on one journey to produce a certain experience or outcome.
This is such a common issue with the modern psychedelic renaissance, so many claims that say “take this pill! or drink this tea! - you will be healed!”.
oooooo baby it just doesn’t always work that way.
It takes a level of maturity and responsibility to be willing to meet whatever arises, in a journey or in LIFE. Hey it ain’t always easy and I obviously don’t always “get it right” either ;)
…but I suppose my own personal journey practice has been a space where I literally do PRACTICE openness.
Journeys last a handful of hours. and then we come back down to earth. Sometimes super tired, sometimes super energized, sometimes filled with sparkly loving goodness, sometimes a pile of grief and sadness, and sometimes just…a big pile of all kinds of things! all these things that naturally emerged in an expanded state that have now moved from the sub to the conscious. and now that it’s out in the open we can relate to these feelings, parts, memories, on the path of embracing our wholeness.
I am SO grateful for the journeys I’ve taken - the lessons, the emotional release, the discovery of what’s been under the surface, even if it’s hard to be with. I want to know myself deeply and be IN RELATIONSHIP with myself in a good way. This requires honesty, openness and self-connection that journeywork has helped me access.
My own practice is what fuels my desire to support others in venturing into their inner space.
Truly, it is such an precious honor to hold space for others to get to explore themselves…as they unravel, unfold, breathe into spaces they didn’t know they weren’t breathing into…open, discover and connect…
♡
Big thank you to all those who have trusted me to hold you in my care, each one of you has contributed to my own growth as a human being.
If you’re curious about this work, know that I offer free 45 min consultation calls to explore if a journey feels right for you at this time in your life….you can ask ALL the questions and I’ll be happy to share with you what I can, honestly and from my heart.
To book a journey consult click here
For a medicine-free subtle craniosacral bodywork session book here
with you + with love,
♡ mari mu ♡
