dog report card
[Alt text: A brown and black dog — a Very Good Boy — lying on the ground with his front paws crossed, smiling at the camera.]
Dear Mary Ellen,
We don't know each other, even though we probably met at your daughter's wedding. I spent most of the reception hanging out with your son-in-law's musician friends. Apologies if we were rowdy.
I started writing this letter to you on your daughter's deck. But, as I am sure you will see when you arrive tomorrow, there is a bird's nest in one of the potted plants out there. Mama bird (I'm told it is a Carolina wren) is never far away from her two freshly hatched babies, and she makes a lot of noise when the dog and I are out there, because she's got food to bring to her babies and we, apparently, are in her way.
Now I'm back inside.
By the time you get here tomorrow, I will be somewhere over the Midwest, en route to my next dogsitting engagement. I'm writing to let you know what I've learned about Winston over the last two weeks. You may already know all this, but just in case:
First and most importantly: He is such a good boy! He asks for so little and is so sweet.
It took me a couple days to figure out (and confirm with your son-in-law) that he is a fearful dog**. His "aggression" on leash is because he is scared of other dogs, especially big dogs. I suspect there is a shelter story behind that scar on his snout.
I had some success distracting him with treats, but then discovered that, when there is no way to avoid walking by someone else with a big dog, it helps even more to keep him on a short leash and talk to him as we pass. If there was a transcript, it would read something like: "That's your friend, we're not going to worry about them, see, they don't care about you, we're just gonna keep it moving, oh hi don't mind us I have a fearful dog here and we're working on it, oh GOOD BOY, Winston, you are doing SUCH a good job!" and so on and so on until we've passed the other dog. I don't care if other people think I'm unhinged.
Longer walks also help. If he can drain some energy, he will be less reactive to dogs he encounters on the way home.
He is also really smart. I've read that with fearful dogs, you can help them build confidence by letting them lead sometimes. Last week Winston took me to a neighborhood on the other side of Ferry Street, to a seemingly random house on a side street, where he stared at the window until someone came out and said, "Is that Winston?"
That's how I met your daughter's friend Stacey.
He also knows where all the snacks are: On the street that runs parallel to this house, on the other side of the railroad tracks, someone leaves Milk Bones on their fence. On Stockton street, people leave snacks out for dogs in front of an art gallery and further north in front of the Pilates studio. Winston will take you to all those places. Honestly, if someone was leaving out ice cream, you could put a leash and collar on me and I'd do the exact same thing.
And thanks to Winston, who kept insisting I cross to the east side of Main Street, I discovered the southern continuation of the tow path. We've had some really nice long walks down there.
One morning we walked around your granddaughter's school. There are two small stone lion sculptures on either side of the front door, and Winston was tail-between-his-legs scared of them. A couple days later we went into the pet "bakery" on Main Street because my friend wanted to buy him a toy. He went straight for a toy that looks like a lion, and now it's his favorite thing. We named the lion Lenny.
At dusk, like many dogs I know, Winston gets a little hyper and needs to play. This is where Lenny comes in. We've been playing tug and fetch with Lenny every night. He really only needs about 10 minutes of this kind of play before he's officially done for the day.
But then it's snack time. If he's staring at you, it's because he's used to getting a treat in the early evening. Your son-in-law bought these revolting dehydrated cow ears from the local organic market. I cut them in half to make them last longer. The treats make him really thirsty though. That's why there's a second water bowl over there.
His favorite spot seems to be the closet in the guest room. When I told one of the (gay) neighbors about that, she laughed and said, "This is New Hope. No one should be in the closet."
Anyway, I've made up the first floor guest room bed with clean sheets. The dishes in the dishwasher are clean. I'll let you take it from here.
Please take good care of Mister Winston. I miss him already.
Links
Psyched that the Oxford Dictionary of African American English is happening. (NYT)
It looks like most parts of DC are going to survive flooding from climate change. (NPR)
Here's a quiz that will tell you just how much of a fascist you are. According to my results, I am a "liberal airhead." Curtsy emoji. (Anesi)
Someone made a dollhouse that looks like an '80s punk rock squat, and it won a big award. (Boing Boing)
The bees here in PA are the size of my thumb. I was calling them murder hornets until I found out they are, in fact, cicada killer wasps. (Smithsonian)
Speaking of bugs, I'd like a word with whoever named the cockchafer. (Bernoid)
Gorgeous 1920s prints of butterflies. (Flashbak)
TLC's "No Scrubs" done Blink-182 style. And it works! (Digg)
Hilarious dude lands airplane because pilot was wasted. (Twitter)
A sheep that thinks it's a dog. (Twitter)
Senate candidate John Fetterman supports Medicare for all the motherfuckers in the back. "I knew we were in for some real shit when Fetterman wrapped the mic cord around his wrist and started pacing around the stage like a caged tiger." (Hard Times)
** The first time I took care of a fearful dog, a couple years ago in San Francisco, I didn't know. My friend told me her dog was "skittish" and "afraid of golden retrievers," when in fact her dog was terrified of all other dogs. I made the mistake of taking that dog to a huge crowded off-leash dog beach and we both came out of that situation a bit traumatized. So I asked a friend, someone who has an actual PhD in dog brain science, for help, and she sent me this article (Dogminded). Better late than never?