looping: hills for the sake of hills
in which two hills are climbed on two separate days with some regrets.
The road to the top of Tealing hill was cleary built by people who very much believe that the quickest way between two points is a straight line. This is less true when you don’t have a motor. The road to the top of Purin hill is similar. Both roads are very much designed to get people to the communications infrastructure that sits atop the hills as directly as possible. They are not, I have decided, good hills to cycle up.
They are also off brand for this publication in that once you get to the top the only option is to turn around and head back the way you came.
A final thing both hills have in common is they’re in Simon Warren’s Cycling Climbs of Scotland book which is the main reason I am doing them. I’ve done all the other local ones in the book and the completest in me is compelled to tick them off.
Tealing is the first one I do because there are a bunch of new roads to get there and I thought it would be a nice climb. I was wrong. The ride there was good with a mix of familiar roads to Dundee and into the South of Angus and then some quite pleasant ones to get to the foot of the climb. I will probably ride those again.
You can see the hill from a way off, helpfully distinguished by the various masts on top of it. As you get closer the road up becomes very obvious as a line across the hill which was the first clue that it was not going to be enjoyable. There’s a left turn on to a road the only really exists to serve a few farms and the transmitters. It almost immediately start to go up fairly quickly to the first cattle grid and gate. It’s at this point you can really see the main bit of the road and notice that the already steep road only gets steeper. This would be the second clue.
As a side note, gated cattle grids on a climb are just rude.
After the second gate and cattle grid the heart of the climb starts and it is horrid. A straight line of unremitting gradientfor much longer than I’d prefer. Absolutely lowest gear and grinding to get up it. There’s a bit of respite as it starts to curve round the top of the hill before a last ramp to the top but, for me at least, most of the climb is at or above threshold. It does not help that It’s blazing sun with not much wind. I have definitely have enough by the time I get to the top.
The views are good, if somewhat marred by various grey buildings, fences, masts and dishes. I am pretty sure I can just about see Edinburgh.
The ride down is probably even less pleasant than the ascent; on the brakes almost the whole time. This is partly due to not wanting to pick up the quantity of speed that not braking would involve, but also because the road is both bumpy and covered in sheep shit. Once I’m past the second gate it improves and is reasonably enjoyable.
The remainder of the ride is good, although a bit like hard work as getting up the hill didn’t do my legs any favours.
The decision to ride Purin hill a couple of weeks later is more or less on a whim. It’s near roads I ride all the time but I’ve never bothered riding largely because of the up and down nature it, but I’m in the area and having ticked off Tealing hill I figure I might as well do it. It comes shortly after stopping for lunch and the enormous slice of carrot cake was possibly a mistake as by the time I get to the bottom of the climb I am not feeling great. This is unfortunate as once again it is very up and is very much a struggle.
The bottom half is a bit more varied than Tealing hill but it becomes another straight and steep effort near the top. It’s fundamentally not as grim due to the variability and a slightly lesser gradient but I’d still not categorise it as fun. If I were on a gravel bike I’d have the option to carry on over the top of the Lomonds which might make the climb a bit more worthwhile. As it is I stop briefly to take in the slightly disappointing views before heading back the way I came. The descent is more enjoyable than Tealing although the road surface is pretty grim so rather sketchy in places.
Once I’m down I head away from Falkland to tick off a small section of previously unridden and probably never ridden again road. It’s nice enough but leads to a busier than I like road which is another mark against the hill.
I’m left slightly puzzled as to why these climbs were selected for the book. There’s a road that goes over the Lomonds a short distance from Purin hill that if ridden from the South is equally as unpleasant or from the North maybe not as steep but certainly more enjoyable. Tealing seems to be there purely because it is unpleasant, which I guess is an attraction to some people.
I’m decidedly not inclined to ride either again.