LIFESTYLE Newsletter Vol. 2 No. 2
Nick's LIFESTYLE Newsletter
This is about the excitement I have for work too.
THIS IS AN INTRODUCTION
Hello again everyone. It's been a stressful few weeks. A cold few weeks. A week that included my wife going to a CONCERT WITH ME~! She claims she had fun too (see Item the First below).
- In the ongoing campaign to make me feel old and all the things my younger self loved feel cheap, one of my favorite German artists, Blümchen, teamed with THE HOFF to make the SONG OF THE SUMMER~! Summer Go Away. I cry. But goddam, Blümchen still looking good for a white lady.
- Melonie and I are trying to watch more movies. We just watched Crazy Rich Asians. That was terrible. It was like a reality TV show made into a movie. I don't know, I just feel like why watch something with unlikeable people as entertainment. Just turn on the news.
- I'm excited for my tail. IN THE MOST NON-FURRY WAY POSSIBLE. I'm not judging, it is just not my preferred pound.
- Friend of the LIFESTYLE, Seppy, has a new game on Kickstarter. IT IS WONDERFUL! Here is a link, please support and give that sweet, sweet LIFESTYLE bump: http://kck.st/2QhEZEz
THIS IS THE END OF THE INTRODUCTION.
3 THINGS THIS WEEK:
ITEM THE FIRST:
I'LL TOAST TO THAT. As mentioned above, we went to the Tuxedo concert a few weeks ago. I bought the tickets the minute they went on sale since I LOVE TUXEDO. (quick intro, I'll wait - Live @ NPR). I immediately shared my excitement with my wife, who was less than excited about being dragged to a concert. I really dislike going to concerts with people since I HAVE A WAY TO CONCERT, but I thought it would be marginally better than any lame date night I would plan. I compromised on my EARLY ARRIVAL requirement, so we were only there 20 mins before doors. I DID THIS FOR HER. We quickly took our front position (since I am short).
There was a DJ for warm up for about an hour. I think I've been done with opening acts for about 20 years, with some rare exceptions (like GRRRL PRTY opening for Astronautalis & P.O.S. 8 Oct 2013 or Maria Isa opening for Murs 17 April 2006). I didn't think Melonie was having fun at all. She doesn't like music. I do not know these ways.
THEN the magic happened. Mayer Hawthorne & Jake One took the stage with the band and I had one of the best concert experiences of my life. Tuxedo is a bit schticky, but not in the Weird Al way. The premise is 70's funk (think Gap Band or Zapp), but in tuxedos like a cheesy prom band. IT WORKS. It was just a fun 75 minutes of back to back bangers and the crowd was just dancing and having a good time. Smiles and fun all around. I even caught Melonie moving her hips TO SUGGEST RHYTHMIC MOTION. I promised her I would stop dragging her to concerts since she dislikes them, but maybe she will go to Tuxedo again.
I find that either a) as I get older or b) live in a dystopian future, that I am enjoying "fun" or mellow music more. Lizzo, Tuxedo, Anderson .Paak are putting out some of my favorite albums right now and I won't even acknowledge my closeted love for shoegaze/dream pop in the past year (Toro y Moi and Neon Indian are both coming to town soon!). As much as I love Public Enemy, I feel like I am at that anger against the system level all the time, so I don't need to feed it with music. I HOPE THIS IS NOT THE FIRST STEP TO CONSERVATISM.
So, drink it up, here is a playlist of the concert!
ITEM THE SECOND:
DUMB DUMB DUMB. This is a bit of an older article (relative to internet time), but it still blows my mind: Are we becoming too stupid to govern ourselves? WHAT A QUESTION! One of the things in the article that resonated was the quote from John Perry Barlow (I'm a big fan of his) about how the internet was going to be a techno-utopia.
When I was a kid, before the WWW was even around, I remember using Usenet and BBSes and talking with people all over the world and thinking how amazing it was. How this would equalize information disparity and help bring about a time of progress and egalitarianism. YES, those were my thoughts when I was 10. I bought into the Hacker Manifesto when I read it in Phrack, because I was that kid. Now, I often wonder if it is all worth it.
When you start library school, they float this "stat" - The Sunday New York Times contains more information than a person would gain in their entire lives 500 years ago. I'm sure it is bullshit, but it goes to show that we are in a time where more information is available to the average person than anytime before. YET we live in a time where Facebook has to tag peoples posts as bullshit. I CANNOT MAKE SENSE OF THIS.
Anyway, the article has just a few examples of where such common, easily verifiable facts are wrapped into the culture of misinformation and the end result is a society that unable to function because of its irrationality. When even the weather is being politicized by a narcissistic dementia patient, I feel like we are fucked.
ITEM THE THIRD:
I WON'T JUDGE YOU FOR MUCH, BUT I WILL FOR THIS. So, this is one of those weird things you never think you are going to have to deal with in an intensely personal way. Late last year, I found out that there is someone tangentially in my life that is a convicted sex offender. This is someone I refuse to talk to, for not just this, but they are still in my life. Since I am me, as soon as I heard they were with "someone not the right age" I hit full research mode and pulled basic court records. Then, since I work where I do, I found out more and not for the better.
One thing you should know about me. I HATE CHILDREN. Literally bottom 5 thing in my world. You know what I hate more? PEDOPHILES. Like bottom 1 thing. I've always had a strong feeling about people that harm children. I hate children, thus I ignore them. I don't go and try to fuck them. THAT IS WRONG. Now, I understand there are some nuances to this. The 16 year girl that sexts her boyfriend and then is later convicted of child pornography. No. The 18 year old African American boy that has a 16 year old white girlfriend is gets arrested. No. The 30 year old person in a position of power over a 14 year old. YES. I AM NOT YOUR FAN.
This intertwines with a general uneasiness listening to Michael Jackson or watching Chris Benoit wrestling matches. I had my Plex on shuffle a month ago and Michael Jackson came on. As discussed in Vol. 1 No. 10, I was a huge MJ fan, but after watching Finding Neverland, boy is it weird. I feel guilty for enjoying it. I turned it down in my car because I didn't want anyone to know I was listening to it. BUT I ENJOY IT. It reminds me of my youth. A youth that he almost certainly deprived other children of having. Part of me thinks the right thing is to just delete it off my server. I JUST DON'T KNOW. I think if it was someone more marginal, it would be easier, but this is the KING OF FREAKING POP. R Kelly? Oh, no worries about never listening to him. Chris Brown? No. But MJ....
Same thing when Plex showed me a Chris Benoit match on shuffle two weeks ago. I stopped what I was doing in the board game room and watched it. I was in awe of how good he was. I was a huge fan of Benoit. Top 5 of all time for me. He wrestled that technical and strong style that I love. After he murdered his family, WWE basically wiped him from existence. Books about Wrestlemania 20, where he headlined in one of the best WWE matches, just didn't mention the match happened. All DVD compilations were pulled from shelves and future ones did not include Benoit matches. Eventually as the years went by they stopped erasing him. They don't promote him, but if you watch a show on the WWE network, they don't scrub his match from it. Is that right?
It is always hard when entertainers you enjoy disappoint you. Most of the time it is just them being human. Maybe they support Trump or got their third DUI. These are things. Molesting children and/or murdering them are terrible things. I DON'T EVEN NEED CAPS FOR THAT. IT IS OBVIOUS.
I'm still trying to figure this out. The whole love the art/not the artist thing, but it really comes into conflict for me with my intense burning hatred for people that harm children. This gets tricky for me since this person is in my life and I'm kinda stuck with that for awhile. I'm forced to interact with artifacts with their name on them and sometimes hear about them and maybe you are too. HOW DO YOU DEAL WITH THIS?
GRATITUDES:
All of my amazing readers. Thank you for all the kind notes and comments in person or over electronic transmission methods. It was heartwarming that many of you took time out of your lives to write. THANK YOU.
LETTERS TO THE EDITOR (please mark "ok to print"):
From a long time reader:
"I'm so glad LIFESTYLE is back...
Regarding your item the third, Accounting of Friendship: I'm glad you were able to take a deep look at your thinking and recognize that it was unhelpful. I had to unpack that mindset myself a few years ago. I, too, was thinking of relationships as transactional. There's a saying I hear used a lot in recovery that "expectations are resentments in waiting", and I think this is where that pain comes from. The expectation of some kind of reward.
In Hamlet, Polonius says (and I'm paraphrasing here) "Neither a borrower nor lender be, because borrowers often lose both the loan and the friend." So rather than viewing acts as some kind of exchange, I needed to change my thinking that any kindnesses from me were simply gifts. No payback required, nor expected. I can say since making that mental shift, I'm a happier person. I'm still nowhere near perfect with it, and my hope is that we all get better at this practice. I think it makes for better friendships."
Thanks for writing and marking it "ok to print." This is RIGHT ON. I tend to transactionalize and/or quantify as many things as possible in my life. It makes it easier to manage and provides a framework for evaluation. However, as discussed last issue, as part of determining my 15 PERSONAL VALUES, I can now use that as a rubric and avoid relying on the OLD WAYS. I very much enjoyed the quote "expectations are resentments in waiting." When people come to the same conclusion by following different paths, IT MUST BE TRUE. I'm glad I'm not the only one that has struggled with this. SOMETIMES we are not as alone as we think.
FAVORITE THING TO GO IN MY EARHOLES THIS WEEK:
SHREDDERS - Vanilla ISIS.
SHREDDERS is a sub-unit of Doomtree. I've really fallen out of Doomtree the past few years. The last P.O.S. album was not my jam. The last Sims was about the same. I really enjoyed the last Lazerbeak one though. I gave the new SHREDDERS album a chance and it is pretty good, this song being one of the stand outs. Specifically, I love the Sims verse on this:
Whoa, it’s a whole fuckin' thing
Type of fear the alt-right finds comforting
Yeah, it’s a whole ducking thing
"Libtard cuck!" yells the Proud Boy puppeting
Ooooooo— Somebody feed the dogs red meat
Clean the plate, boss
Bed sheets stained with the Pizza-Gate sauce
Head Piece cut from the same exact cloth
Yeah
Tell ’em I destroy
You boys got as much flavor as a lime La Croix
Stylish as a New Balance 574
Looking hella sporty, Morty — hate to sell ya short
Live at the appellate court
Voldemort and Skeletor yelling at the void
And their boys on the message board
Should have told ‘em how less is more
So much brilliance in that word play. JUST TO EXPLAIN SOME OF THIS TO MY WIFE:
- "Libtard cuck" is a term the alt-right uses for liberals, merging liberal and retard and shortening cuckhold.
- The Proud Boys are an alt-right, "men's rights," mostly 20-somethings, shockingly (/s) white group.
- Red meat makes dogs excited.
- Pizza-Gate was a conspiracy theory in the 2016 campaign that Hilary Clinton ran a child sex ring in the basement of a pizza shop in DC that didn't even have a basement.
- Head Piece is what the alt-right calls a KKK-style hood, the statement is saying these new alt-right kids are the same as the KKK.
- Lime La Croix has a mild flavor.
- New Balance 574's are the quintessential dad shoe.
- Morty is a reference to the show Rick & Morty, which some alt-right people think is written for them and it is, but in an ironic sense that they don't pick up.
- Voldemort and Skeletor are Sean Hannity and Kellyann Conway.
WE ARE ALL FALLIBLE.
WE ARE ALL CAPABLE OF FORGIVENESS.
BUT ARE WE ALL WORTHY OF IT?
THAT IS ALL.