When You Feel Like the Tip of the Match
Do You Want to Do Some Witchcraft?
I don’t know about you, but my head feels struck against rough surface a lot these days.
Matches are the unsung hero of most of my practice. They’re the thing I never think to include on the pack list because they’re so ingrained in the process. I’ve become loyal to my favorite types, thickness, the reliability of the strike paper. I have strike anywhere matches that I press against river rocks or a piece of brick I pinched from a destroyed factory in Cleveland, just for the drama. There’s something about making fire in your hands when so much of the fire feels out of control.
I soak them in oils, pack them in charm bags, snap them in half with the tension of pressing them against the striking paper and hoping this time the damn thing will light. I pile them in kindling hills and stash them in the bodies of poppets.
But lately, I’ve forgotten when it’s like to not be on fire. To not feel tingling in my fingers as a temperature rises. And the ritual item that is so persistent, I have a permanent indent from where the matchbox rests in my kit, has spent more time spilled across my table.
My grandmother died when I was five. Everything I’ve ever learned about her has been snatched, like cracks of sunlight, through the stories about other people. I remember pieces, her cancer cough, her blue blanket, the wisps of her chemo hair.
I don’t remember the matches. But my mother does. She slices a yellow onion and says, “If your grandma were here she’s have a matchstick between her teeth, swearing it helps with the crying.”
I’ve been working on making match holders with shaped strike paper, sigils, and stored in little tins that can be slipped into even the tightest jeans pocket. But I’m not lighting them, I’m allowing them to rest, unstruck, because one of us should be.
I’ve taken to putting a matchstick between my teeth, just to stop the tears. Walking around with fire in the mouth, extinguished by tongue and cheek.
I’ll let you know if the grandmother’s trick works.
This week was the official release of Spells for Success with Simon Element! You can buy this deck in any bookstore. It has guidance for intention setting, spells for forming a union, spells for where to put your feelings when you have too many. Check it out.
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