Parallel universes and empathy
We often talk about putting yourself in the other person's shoes and looking at things from that perspective. That's an easy advice but hard to do in real life for a variety of reasons - like it's impossible to think like another person. A million experiences resulted in a particular way of looking at the world. Instead, here is an alternative framing - is there a parallel universe where there is a possibility that what the other person is saying might be true/relevant/valid? In that case, what would they stand to benefit?
Scenario: During an emergency, everyone is worried about job loss and possible reduction in work. One person asked whether the company would pay her lunch bills. People have expressed distaste at the pettiness of the ask. Framing it in the parallel universal way, you could think of a person, who is probably living from month-to-month pay check but is now forced to pay for food bills due to factors beyond her control. That is a valid concern.
The same applies for negative intentions as well. Is there a parallel universe, where there is a possibility that what the other person is saying might be harmful/bad/ill-intentioned?
Scenario: A senior leader pushing hard to use a particular vendor without regarding your suggestion for a fair evaluation of all vendors.
But empathy also should account for Hanlon's razor (don't attribute to malice that which can be sufficiently attributed to ignorance - I'm paraphrasing). Same scenario with the vendor and the senior leader.
Of course, evaluating all possible scenarios and all possible intentions for all possible interactions, especially in real time, can be impossible or very tiring. However, you only have to come up with one for positive, negative and Hanlon. This is a good way to get to first-rate intelligence as described by Scott Fitzgerald:
"The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function."