guide.notes 32 | mushy mind, low tide days
dear kindred friends,
after two weeks of writing everyday about world-building, this week I watched as my mind slowed down into the consistency of mushy vegetables. (hello, luteal phase.)
I woke up some days and felt like an empty lake; totally dry of inspiration, creative spark, or motivation. it was a lot of effort to do one task per day.
past versions of me would've felt super guilty, and berated myself for this. but recently, I've been thinkinga about the vital importance of low tide days / fermentation days / mushy mind days.
question: instead of resisting the cyclical nature of creative energy, our bodies and psyches, what if we embraced it -- completely and radically? what if we ride the waves? how would our days look different?
this week, I'm sharing a new podcast cover art I made, some simmering intentions for a creative community, and some art & useful juice from the archives.
~~~
🍄 fermentation notes
while in the middle of doodle-sketching for episode 1, somehow this visual emerged and told me that it wanted to be the new cover of the podcast. the old one was too busy, it said. I said yes.
this audio baby is overdue; and I'm both anxious, excited, and overwhelmed in a very good way.
podcast art 2.0 | botanical studies of internet magic — kening zhu
a new podcast cover for botanical studies
why a creative community?
last year, I wrote a post interrogating my tensions between a desire for solitude vs. being part of a community. as step 1.0 to preparing to birth this thing (due date: this spring), I start with how I always start: exploring my own intentions.
intentions for a creative community — kening zhu
exploring my intentions and desires for building community
🗺️ guide from my past self (to my present self)
4 years ago: I was thinking about work / play / rest as feeling-states, above all else, and the hybrid states in between. this belongs in the category of "wisdom I knew, but took years to embody." this feels really relevant this week.
a theory of rest-play-work — kening zhu
work like you play — work and play and rest are not just things that we do, they are also feelings.
🃏 creations | travel cards from istanbul
[I drew this a few weeks ago, and forgot to share.]
one of my favorite places in istanbul - somehow the energy here feels like a most potent distillation of the city.
karaköy docks | istanbul travel deck no. 8 — kening zhu
one of my favorite places in the city
a mysterious enchanted ancient roman cistern, with medusa head as columns (I had a lot of fun drawing this one).
basilica cistern | istanbul travel deck no. 9 — kening zhu
a mysterious watery place
📝 notes: what's rolling around my mind
1 | unsubscribing from emails: I'm starting the practice of unsubscribing to at least 1 newsletter per day, until everything in my inbox is something that I want to read. likewise, my intention is to send emails I would relish reading. I've reprogrammed myself to feel happy/relief when people unsubscribe from my list, because one thing I've become more and more certain of -- is that I want my community to be highly self-selecting, very special, unicorn-like magical people.
2 | reading as a child: one of the reasons I was a deeply voracious reader as a child is because (a) I checked out books from the local library, with due dates (b) I grew up restless and bored in small town NC, in the days of dial up internet, and (c) I was highly competitive. I read books and took "AR" -- accelerated reading -- tests (do you remember those?). they accumulated into points, and at the end of the year, I would win a cash prize (like $200) for coming in 1st place. the point was not money, though; I don't think I was even aware of the prize. now, in my adult quest to read more, I'm wondering if I can play with my motivation system. why read? how to read more? when to read? pleasure is important, but sometimes, maybe pressure is pleasureful, too. (that is to say, if it doesn't feel too much like work, but play-work).
🎨 colorable to-do list (week 3)
my intention: minimize this list as much as possible. I do well with less things, but more intensely. also: definitely design this for cyclical variations.
clouds = newsletters
stars = world flow
seashell = launching the podcast
fish = clients
diamonds = energy work
🌕 inspiration log
a film I watched: army of thieves (2021) (6/10). this was enjoyable and interesting to see locksmithery as a work of exquisite craftsmanship, and safe-cracking as an art form / act of appreciation, like solving a puzzle. the movie itself was fine, but this concept lingers with me. what parallels can we draw between safe-cracking and other difficult things in life?
finished reading: the mysterious affair at styles by agatha christie. I'm not sure if I have anything articulate to say about agatha christie's style (yet), but I read this in two sittings, and really enjoyed it. kind of like watching someone cracking a safe.
started reading: my struggle by karl ove knausgaard. I'm not very far in, but the mundanity of his writing about the small little details really pulls you in. why? how does he remember all that he experienced? how does he take notes? somehow, I think this book will give me permission to be an ordinary observer of my life -- and to feel free in writing about it.
💌 ask me / tell me anything
send me a note via this minimalist form, or hit reply:
❓ open question: low tide days
I so loved your responses to my reading question from last week, thank you (and if I haven't written you back yet, your email is coming, soon!)
my open question for this week is:
how do you guide yourself through low tide / low energy days or weeks? what do you do to rest, or rest-play, or give yourself permission to do either? what are your favorite things to do, or guilty pleasures to indulge in -- that feel good and nourishing to you?
--
my current urges for the above: have a no-screens day. binge watch a good TV show. take long naps. read a whole book. linger at a cafe. give myself a few days off, and not feel super guilty about it. (this is a work in progress).
❤️ until next week,
thank you for reading!
kening
🌱 PS. idea-seeds & urges
my mind feels pretty dry this week.
what if I made a [low tide day kit] for my future self, to help me really embody this part of my cycle? what would go inside it?)
I have a few inspiration log posts, on backlog. I'm thinking about the relationship between what I absorb and what I create. there have been a few podcasts I really enjoyed, and I'm feeling the urge to: write about it? take notes? engage with it actively?
after I get out of these mushy-mind days, I'll start a new train of thought / series of posts for my website. I have a small feeling that it might be about branding (which I honestly really love), but this might change, depending on how launching the podcast feels.
🪷 this is guide.notes 32, a weekly letter on nourishing an embodied, rich creative life in psychic, digital, and material worlds.