throwing panties in the pool (justin's version)
when we were on molly saturday and lying in bed in each others arms after fucking, deborah brought up a yoko ono meme i'd shared recently (where yoko had posted a tweet about john and someone quote tweeted it with the reply "girl move on") and i thought she was talking about another yoko ono meme i'd shared recently which i can't find right now and am going to butcher in retelling but someone posted pictures of jada pinkett smith and tupac and wrote a caption "i can't believe yoko ono dated will smith" and someone else responded "??!?! i didn't know they dated?" and then the OP responded "oh never mind i got her confused with jada pinkett smith")
(the quarterly molly trip which is always of course the best day of the quarter. i know i have this rose-colored-glasses approach to drugs that elides many of the very real harms they can do especially for some people but i really just wish everybody who wants to could take this drug a few times a year to experience a version of life where like that animation at the end of the grinch who stole christmas the love in your heart swells and bursts through the spiky shell that despite your best intentions you and the conditions of the world have put around yourself. i try to use my phone to voice record the entire day each of these times as a way to try to capture that special aura and be able to remember how it's possible to feel)
deborah found a tennis ball under the entertainment center and i was bouncing it happily while she cooked dinner and i'm thankful for the joy of bouncing a ball, which school gym class, hopefully the closest thing i ever experience to prison (vivid memory of a terrible tenth grade bully who liked to call me "virginia slims" because the one thing that was known of me at my second high school in suburban tennessee was that i had moved there from virginia), prevented me from experiencing that joy for a long time but which is so pure, the magic of the physics, of the call and response of sending the ball to the floor and it shooting up into the air and then you turning up your palm and catching it as it falls and then starting the loop again, as many times as you want for free.
similarly, i found some a small bag of balloons when i was cleaning out my office at the start of the year and blew one up and i love how this tiny bit of rubber seems to transcend the humbleness of its initial appearance, first feeling it expand and firm up in your hands as you force all the air in your lungs into it and then once you've tied it off and it's complete the fact that gravity acts on it more slowly and you can keep it up in the air with small bops that make a lovely sound and related e shared a playlist she made of songs inspired by her shared favorite song with her partner and on the playlist was a midlake song which reminded me of my favorite midlake song from when i was in college which was "balloon maker" and remembering how in college i put pennies in balloons i then blew up with the idea that people could pop them and if the pennies landed face up we'd have generated luck.
the taylor swift lyric "throwing pennies in the pool" which i will never not hear as "throwing panties in the pool" (justin's version). kylie and timmy at the golden globs makes me happy for both of them (and he will be so great on the kardashians if it lasts!). h revealed yesterday that she has a new boyfriend and he seems really great and she's really happy <3. also in our group chat (of a taurus (h), leo (deborah), scorpio(me), deborah shared an astrology meme of the signs from "MOST TO LEAST STUBBORN" the first entries of which are 1. taurus 2. scorpio 3. leo (the rest of the entries, in ascending order bc i know someone will ask, are: aquarius, capricorn, aries, cancer, sagittarius, gemini, pisces, virgo, and libra).
wikipedia entry for the mineral "cummingtonite" (IMA symbol: 'Cum'), which i saw in a meme and thought was obviously shopped but then i looked it up and it was real!!! (this is another of the small pleasures of our insane world that i appreciate, where there is something silly that you think must be fake but against all odds it turns out to be real)
postmortem (sorry) group chat joyfully talking shit about a murder at the end of the world with deborah and r which ended with me making the prediction that "before we die ai will have advanced enough that we can just say 'do it but give us what we wanted' and it will read our brains and generate it from our hopes" (which for me is utopian but i realize for most people is dystopian) and reaffirming that my san junipero will involve watching lots of tv.
being back at work has been pretty good all things considered. yesterday i volunteered two theories in response to questions asked in slack and in both cases a really smart senior colleague who i respect started their eventual response with "justin is right" which was very validating. the first few sprints of the quarter are focused on improvements rather than new feature work and i'm finally getting space to sand some of the rough edges off the tool i built in a day years ago that everyone uses all the time.
this wild diagram of the relationships between different forms of citrus, because as this email explained there are basically three different forms of citrus and all the other ones we know are just different mixtures of the three! the woman bagging our groceries at don quijote who, seeing that deborah had bought some granola, said she puts it in her oatmeal for textural contrast and i've been doing it and it is really quite nice! leftover pizza from the weekend for lunch on a monday (and eating all that was left (a slice and a half) instead of being "responsible" and eating just a slice because it's such good fucking pizza)
