thank you notes 9/6

i'm thankful to have gone on two long runs this weekend and to have slept and felt great rather than having the weird emotional and physical crash i've experienced the last few times i went on long runs. i'm thankful to imagine i can go back to long runs, which would make me very happy. i'm thankful for the kimchi jigae i made and thankful that i bought the pre-chopped kimchi this time rather than the uncut one, which makes such a mess. i'm thankful for MSG. i'm thankful for how impossibly good salty roasted seaweed is when wrapped around a clump of short grain white rice. i'm thankful that d made one of my favorite cakes for dessert.

i'm thankful that d and i watched two more episodes of stranger things. i'm thankful for angel olsen's new album, my woman, which is so so so good. i'm thankful for kurt cobain and i'm thankful for chrissie hynde. i'm thankful that yesterday while d was working, she was listening to "doesn't really matter" by janet jackson and thankful that when i asked what song it was, she told me that and that it was originally on the soundtrack of the nutty professor.

"SCORPIO 

Happiness is elusive and weird and maybe not even something to strive for per se, but I do know that one component of happiness is to want less. Attachment and desire are bitches. One way to want less is to start by wanting what we have. And the way to want what we have is through a gratitude practice. Gratitude sounds annoying when you’re not feeling it. But I bet you can find at least ten things a day to put on a list."

i'm thankful to have deleted the twitter app from my phone for the nth time because i felt unhappy that i used it to fill my mind in any idle moment, even though what i read there often gave me pleasure. i'm thankful that i will probably relapse and want to go back to it soon, but i'm thankful to make myself take a break and see how that feels. i'm thankful for the novel i am reading, golden hill  by francis spufford, which i picked up after patrick raved about it and which is delightful so far. i'm thankful i meditated last night for the first time in weeks or a month even. i'm thankful for matthew mcconaughey's pep talk for the UT football team. i'm thankful to just keep living.