like imagine having a cavity in the renaissance

i’m thankful, having gotten a cavity filled today, for dental anesthetic, since it’s not like even with a topical anesthetic and then an injected one shot carefully into two parts of my gums, it’s a pleasant experience being drilled with a power tool (and they tell you to tell them if you have sensitivity, but also of course you fucking have sensitivity they are sculpting a part of your body wrapped around raw nerves (he told me to raise my left hand and i wonder if that depends on whether the dentist is left handed or not, there are so many weird little sayings like after he finished when he was having me test my bite on a piece of cardboard and says 'tippy tippy tap tap' to describe how and then he said it again, like it was his little song) and so you're, if you're me, like holding your body incredibly tight your hands gripping each other trying to determine whether there's going to be a point where you're going to have to raise your hand but not wanting to be that person and he pulls the tool out and each time you think "okay maybe done now, definitely not going to keep drilling harder and deeper!" and then he goes back in again and he and then having this putty splooged into the side of your tooth and hardened with a light wand that is shoved into your lip and makes this weird beeping sound and more scraping and polishing and then you're done, but one of the very many reasons i would not want to travel back in time is like imagine having a cavity in the renaissance or something fuckkkk.

i’m thankful that though when i went out to my bike to bike the thirty five minutes south to my appointment, looking forward to the ride even as i was not looking forward to the destination, and when i went into the garage and my back tire was flat, it was okay because i took an uber. i’m thankful that i could afford that, and afford to tip well, and that i have good dental insurance that meant my filling cost a reasonable copay that i could afford. i'm thankful that on wednesday, i got a new pair of glasses since the pair that i had before were two years old and hazy with scratches. i'm thankful for how clearly i am able to see now (and regret that i waited so long seeing the way i used to).

i’m thankful that i am working on production code as my job now and it makes me so happy. i’m thankful, having not realized how bitter i had gotten about the dissatisfactions of my previous job. i’m thankful that i could get the new job without having to switch companies. i’m thankful for my former manager, who is incredible and who to celebrate me leaving the support team for the engineering team got me a cameo of jake from love island (a water engineer, so extra meaningful) congratulating me. i’m thankful for my new manager, who is a font of joy. i’m thankful to know that work isn’t your family or whatever but i’m also thankful to have been able to form rich bonds with people i’ve worked with, since if you have to spend so much of your life at work it's really nice when you like the people you spend it with. 

i’m thankful for the show /see/ on apple tv, which, i did not know whether, at first, a) jason momoa, sexy as he is, could carry a TV show and b) that a tv show full of people pretending to be blind would be compelling, but it’s honestly really weird and good, i love it. if you weren’t already convinced by jason momoa, there’s an evil queen character who lives in a hydroelectric dam for whom sex is a way of communing with god, like when she “prays” she’s holding down the head of the person going down on her and speaking in tongues to herself, it’s wild. we watched /the walking dead/ (a show i can’t believe i’m still watching but am of course watching) after binging the first season of /see/ and i kept being like watching these people traverse this brutal desolate postapocalyptic world and being like "it's so easy you can see everything!!!"