(c)

i'm thankful for forward motion. i'm thankful that i know it's okay to cry, and that i can also distract myself with making coffee, and the sense of calm that takes over when the hot water reaches the top of the cone, and then recedes. i'm thankful that i am allowed to do life at my own pace. breathing helps with pacing. i learned a new breathing exercise: in through the nose, out through the mouth, and swallow. the swallow is because the tongue is connected to the spine, and tightness in the shoulders can be helped with intentional breath and swallow. i'm thankful to have learned that when the throat is sore, one must ask, what is the head trying to get to the heart, and what is the heart trying to get to the head? i'm thankful that he told me what was in his head and heart. i'm thankful to be loved, to have loved, and to have been loved, but to also be learning that being loved and loving is not all that it takes for two people to be happy with one another. i'm thankful for the lovers before me who have come up with cliches that turn out to have truth. i'm thankful that i'm not afraid to be gushy or stereotypically romantic. i'm thankful for the power to speak my truth, to evaluate what i need, for the confidence i'm gaining to ask for what i need, for the release of expectations, for patience.