4/1/20
i'm thankful that how i have felt day to day at work lately puts into relief how stressed i felt for a long time before this job and don't feel now. i'm thankful to try to hold onto that new feeling for a while. i'm thankful that it doesn't seem like anybody's going to get laid off so far. i'm thankful we took a brief morale break to play the heads up game on zoom and i successfully guessed "quinoa" and "candy corn" and kh, trying to give a clue for "donkey," said "like a horse, but dumber" which was a successful clue but then inspired a follow-up discussion about how actual that's unfair to donkeys.
i'm thankful that miso was weirdly rambunctious and playful last night and i'm thankful that we learned that maybe feeding her canned pumpkin will prevent her from wanting to eat her own poop, a thing she does with great relish, because apparently though pumpkin is delicious to dogs to eat something happens that makes it really gross for them to eat in the poop? i don't know, this concept disgusts me and is why i have just learned to live with this topic rather than trying to do something to change it.
i'm thankful that i had really misremembered the second season of the wire as being completely divorced from the characters and narratives of the first season and i'm thankful to have realized that was definitely not the case and i needed not have worried.
i'm thankful that we found the good vape pen in the crevice of the couch after having lost it for a week or two. i'm thankful i cleaned the bong with alcohol. i'm thankful for this strain called death star and to wish for an essay on weed strains that have dark or negative names and the semiotics of that.
i'm thankful that on march 1st, i got an automated birthday greeting email with the subject line "Happy Birthday, Laurie!" from united healthcare and i'm thankful that i then got the same email on march 2nd and march 3rd and march 4th and i kept getting the same email, every day, around 11am, and as the days went on, and then the weeks and the emails nevertheless continued to persist, i began to feel that "Happy Birthday, Laurie!" represented to me a celebration of life and a kind of harbinger of springtime, of rebirth and opening up, and even though it was on one hand annoying to continue to receive these emails day after day, they formed a kind of pulse and i kind of hoped that whatever machine that was in a strange loop of sending them would just continue in that loop forever, always laurie's birthday because we can't die on laurie's birthday, and then anyway today the emails stopped, unless it's a prank, which until tomorrow there's always the possibility, and even after tomorrow, and on and on.
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