3/24
i'm thankful that on sunday they were out of lentils at fred meyer, even though that was annoying because we had already gotten all the other ingredients for our favorite smitten kitchen soup, because i didn't want to stop at another grocery store on the way home and so promised to go to new seasons later in the day on my run, which committed me to running outside in a way i couldn't bail out of, and so i'm thankful i ran outside for the third or so time this calendar year, even though it was hard on my legs and they were sore after, because it did also feel nice and the neurochemical cocktail of tired you get after running outside is so much better than the one you get after running on the treadmill, even though i am also thankful for the treadmill, and anyway i'm thankful that in the bulk beans at new seasons they had lentils so we were able to make the soup.
i'm thankful for the soup, which i have made even better than it already was by performing my favorite a.rom flavor trick and starting the mirepoix with a can of anchovies rather than just olive oil (and also doing the things i normally do, like using a whole pound of sausage and two cans whole tomatoes one can chicken broth instead of one can whole tomatoes two cans water and always more garlic because come on). i'm thankful they only had hot italian sausage at the fred meyer, even though i normally buy mild or sweet italian sausage, since the heat did add a certain je ne sais quoi to the flavor. i'm thankful that i did not lose or break the bay leaves and that they were easy to fish out at the end, since that is not always the case. i'm thankful for sourdough bread and soft butter and honey.
i'm thankful that at work yesterday i tried a thing where i timed myself on every support ticket and kept little diary notes on my experience, even though the introduction of metrics always makes me feel a little bit squicky since generally productivity data seems to only ever be used against workers rather than for them, but i'm thankful that tracking things was my idea, not my coach's, and that it was borne out of me not being able to hit the eject button when i've been in a ticket i don't understand for too long and of course the tricky thing is that part of being technical support is being the person who hits the wall and climbs over it and hits another and finds a hole off to the left but there is also a point at which i am not getting anywhere further into a problem and i'm just making myself feel bad for staying in it, throwing good money after bad, with money being my sanity, and so i thought it would be interesting and potentially more useful to try to identify what that point is so i can better recognize it in the moment. i'm thankful not to be bound to that, but i'm also thankful for the opportunity to try things to make my experience better. i'm thankful that yesterday i generally felt competent and like i was doing a good job, which is an achievement after six weeks or so of doing it, i should remind myself, and i'm thankful also that i did not have any meetings yesterday and i do not have any meetings today.
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