3/16/19
(tw: me talking about the weirdness of the (my) male body)
i'm thankful i have started wearing underwear again. i'm thankful that i work from home and that therefore i don't really have to wear proper clothes like ever (i'm thankful that i jumped on a call with a coworker yesterday morning to help her with some javascript while wearing my bathrobe without a shirt on under it and she was wearing her pajamas and we both were like "yeah, i thought about putting on clothes but i figured you wouldn't care"), which, like many things about my job, is a huge privilege. i'm thankful, as someone who has never really much liked wearing underwear, to have basically stopped wearing underwear, usually wearing sweatpants or loose gym shorts without any underwear on under them. i'm thankful for this feeling of freedom, which i enjoyed for a time, but i'm thankful that lately when the part where my ball sack is connected to my body started to be sore and ache, which the hypochondriac in me immediately started to see as possible terrible life-ending things, the more rational person in me eventually was like "you stand at a standing desk for eight hours a day while not wearing any underwear and gravity is a thing" and so i started wearing underwear again and my balls don't hurt anymore lol. i'm thankful for the new uniqlo underwear i bought in denver, which are much more comfortable than the old american apparel underwear i normally wear, and to have decided to buy some more. i'm thankful for support.
i'm thankful i have started wearing underwear again. i'm thankful that i work from home and that therefore i don't really have to wear proper clothes like ever (i'm thankful that i jumped on a call with a coworker yesterday morning to help her with some javascript while wearing my bathrobe without a shirt on under it and she was wearing her pajamas and we both were like "yeah, i thought about putting on clothes but i figured you wouldn't care"), which, like many things about my job, is a huge privilege. i'm thankful, as someone who has never really much liked wearing underwear, to have basically stopped wearing underwear, usually wearing sweatpants or loose gym shorts without any underwear on under them. i'm thankful for this feeling of freedom, which i enjoyed for a time, but i'm thankful that lately when the part where my ball sack is connected to my body started to be sore and ache, which the hypochondriac in me immediately started to see as possible terrible life-ending things, the more rational person in me eventually was like "you stand at a standing desk for eight hours a day while not wearing any underwear and gravity is a thing" and so i started wearing underwear again and my balls don't hurt anymore lol. i'm thankful for the new uniqlo underwear i bought in denver, which are much more comfortable than the old american apparel underwear i normally wear, and to have decided to buy some more. i'm thankful for support.
i'm thankful that yesterday i had my pairing session with the kind engineer and got to watch him in the console of his browser think through all the possible solutions to a complex problem, then test out the best of them rapid fire before writing a function. i'm thankful for the homework he gave me, which is challenging but manageable, and i'm thankful that our session didn't go too late (since i worry that i'm already taking up too much of his time). i'm thankful he helped me get set up with prettier, which is really crazy. i'm thankful that i followed up with my coworker who was having concerns about her manager, asking how her feelings had evolved and thinking through some potential moves she could make, which i think (hope) was helpful for her. i'm thankful that work in general has been better the last two days than it was the two days before and i'm thankful to hope that continues today. i'm thankful that a really confusing issue i escalated to engineering was actually a really confusing issue and not just an example of me being confused. i'm thankful to be near the end of the project i've been working on and i'm thankful for the structural change i made to how it stores data, which has required an annoying amount of work to refactor but which is going to be totally worth it in terms of user experience. i'm thankful to almost be at the end because i've been working on this for longer than i thought i would be and am excited about the other things i can move on to doing next. i'm thankful it's friday.
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