12/1
i'm thankful that yesterday was a good day, if a hard day. i'm thankful that i started a really uncomfortable conversation with my supervisor, because it was a necessary thing to do. i'm thankful to have let myself have the thought, as i decided whether to start it or not, that if i lost my job, i would get another job, but i couldn't continue in this job without having a frank discussion with her about how things are. i'm thankful that writing for a long time has focused my communication skills and made it possible for me to be painfully honest but at the same time try to offer sympathy and empathy for her and be as respectful as possible. i'm thankful to hope that the conversation is a step toward making things better for our team, but i'm thankful even if it isn't that i said what i needed to say, which freed up a lot of space inside of me that was filled with fire. i'm thankful that though it was busier than ever yesterday afternoon, i felt much better, because i wasn't being consumed by feelings.
i'm thankful that by funny coincidence d also had a scary but good conversation at work. i'm thankful that after my uncomfortable conversation in the morning but before her scary one in the afternoon we went to lunch with our coworker. i'm thankful that the coworker convinced me to try a pizzeria which i had written off as bad when we went there after they opened but which is much improved. i'm thankful he let me treat us and thankful to have the money to be able to offer that. i'm thankful for the pizza with grape and gorgonzola and a thin coating of a honey oil. i'm thankful for lunch beers. i'm thankful that we had leftovers that we ate for dinner last night. i'm thankful that after dinner i facetimed with my dad. i'm thankful for his pride in his jerry-rigged system for transporting a garden hose from their apartment's balcony to the ground floor and for his joy at a similar system d recommended using a piece of bamboo to trigger a motion detector light. i'm thankful we told him about our boss conversations and he happily reminisced about a similar conversation he had with a boss of his own years ago.
i'm thankful for the way that talking (or writing, or singing, or drawing) about hard experiences can "turn those negative occurrences into something that can make another person feel like their circumstance is temporary, and it can be overcome, you know." i'm thankful to not be a hard rock when i really am a gem. i'm thankful to have learned about these two web series, which both sounds great. i'm thankful for sadie dupuis. i'm thankful that robert fripp and/or whoever updates this wikipedia feel the necessity to distinguish between Fripperies and Fripperertronics. i'm thankful for dziga vertov (and am thankful to recommend "the man with the movie camera" if you've never seen it). i'm thankful for this podcast, in which comedy god chelsea peretti sings an amazing cover of "greatest love of all" (beginning at 14:36) which is funny and yet at the same time quite moving. i'm thankful for plane shifting and code switching. i'm thankful for the possibility space of the human voice.
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