11/9/17

i'm thankful we watched mr. robot last night, even though that show has become basically incoherent gibberish, but gibberish that is just stylish and engaging enough that we will continue to watch it, even though at the end of every episode when the video file cuts to black and d's old computer's desktop is revealed we look at each other and are like "what the fuck was that" and not in a good way, but even still for all its flaws i'm thankful for the episode we watched last night because it used, in the slow mo wordless montage at the end of the episode, "everything means nothing to me" by elliott smith, which i hadn't heard since i was in college, i don't think, more than a decade ago, and which is a precious stone of a song, his falsetto souls climbing ladders of major scale toward heaven even as the words they're singing are bitter pills, invalidating the very thing they yearn for. i'm thankful for the conflict between beauty and struggle and for works of art that make me believe beauty can sometimes come out ahead, for a little while.