11/3/17
i'm thankful that my twitter account should be reenabled in a couple of hours, after it was disabled last night because i had once written a tweet with the text "plz kill all white americans including me" and then included a link to something shitty about white americans or something shitty that white americans had done that day which i don't know what it is now, there are so many shitty things to choose from, and can't find out since they forced me to delete my tweet to "start the countdown" to restore my ability to tweet. i'm thankful that this brief forced break caused me to meditate on how much brain space twitter occupies for me, how tweeting my ephemeral thoughts and retweeting things from my feed feels like maintaining my cabinet of curiosities and how not having that ability (or the ability to even read my feed, since it keeps popping up the stupid countdown for restoration) feels like having an important chunk of my brain missing, which is kind of disturbing.
i'm thankful that yesterday evening when d and i got off work, i went to take the trash out and discovered that though we had both thought it was cold outside because it had been cold outside the day before, it was actually 67 degrees and totally lovely. i'm thankful for the reprieve of an unseasonably warm day after the weather has gotten cold already, how it helps one to imagine that these days of frost and decay are impermanent and will change. i'm thankful that because of that and because we had an hour before we had to meet our friends, we decided, rather than taking an uber directly from our house, we would walk towards the bar where we were meeting our friends and then get picked up along the way. i'm thankful that we had a lovely walk down the trail toward town—it had rained yesterday, but not so much that there were big puddles or mud to stain our shoes.
i'm thankful for our observation of all the different leaves, for the pattern between leaves showing their bleached white undersides and the toasted reds and oranges and browns of their fronts. i'm thankful for our discussion of how we could imagine every. i'm thankful to have told d about the fantasy i have every of a conceptual art project where i rake the leaves out of the path, moving section by section down the whole path trying to cover it, even though of course new leaves would fall and blow into the sections i had raked, making it an ephemeral installation. i'm thankful that d and i were talking about sex therapy and i pitched the tv show idea/stupid joke "dr. quinn: sex therapist" which is "dr. quinn: medicine woman" and takes place in the same period, but with the character being a pioneering imaginary sex therapist instead of a normal doctor (i'm thankful d said she would watch).
i'm thankful to have had a good day at work. i'm thankful that my pull request got merged and that the beta of the tool using it should come out today. i'm thankful to have had an interesting research interview about how communication works at our company with a new employee who is trying to find ways to improve it. i'm thankful for a nice pair chat with another coworker who lives in canada and who was telling me that last year at their house, they had more than 800 trick or treaters whereas this year was much "lighter" (only 550). i'm thankful on my lunch break to have eaten 5 cinnamon roll flavored oreos (i'm thankful that because the package wasn't sealed properly, they had gotten soft, which is normally not a good thing for oreos but for cinnamon roll flavor honestly kind of worked). i'm thankful that of the halloween candy we bought, i have enjoyed eating the butterfingers the most, even though i think butterfingers are gross and they stick to my teeth in a way that is both unpleasant and must mean something bad for my dental health. i'm thankful to bruss and floss regularly but i'm also thankful to let myself eat stupid candy.
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