This is my brand new newsletter! It’s about how I haven't been drawing that regularly for years, and I want to change that. I don't feel good in the world without my art. It's my home and first language in many ways, more than any spoken language or place.

Since I last drew regularly, generative art has blown up. And while a lot of the suffering and vulnerability would be gone with some kind of guaranteed outcome, I realized I don’t see the point of “generating” art this way.

The making is the thinking. There's a reason 'trust the process' is such a commonplace phrase: I can never know exactly how the outcome will turn out until it’s done. And I don't miss “producing pictures,” I miss drawing. It's agonizing and messy and so much joy! Serious fun. Sometimes I’m in a blissful state of flow and I forget about time, and sometimes it’s just dreadful and I curse everything. Sometimes my critical eye helps to make it better, and other times it just ruins the work and my confidence for a while. Not all papers make it through the process in one piece, but so far all my screens are intact.

There might be a place for some type of generative models in my workflow, but it won't excuse me from 'the process'. I want to get unstuck. I want to relearn how to 'trust the process' — and while I do, I’m curious to explore what I can and cannot hand over to a generative model without messing it all up.

I think I will commit to a year of making and sharing, and see where I end up. I have several books, exercises, tutorials, essays, and stacks of empty papers prepared, but I don't yet know how the format will look. What I can promise is some nice drawings, lots of trial and error, and some AI commentary if you come along!