A Weekend In Lisbon: Hits And Misses
FRIDAY
Velvet Velour @ Mercado do Rato
HIT: A bizarrely OTT light box projecting a giant visualizer on the back wall of the market, which provided some welcome distraction from everything else.
MISS: It was 15€ to get in and 4€ for a beer plus 1€ for a cup, all on an obscure phone-based QR Code system.
MISS: As you might expect with those prices, the crowd was almost entirely made up of mid-20-something ‘betos’ — Portugal’s homegrown brand of preppy moronic rich kids, greasy with self-entitlement.
MISS: For example, there was the beto who shouted “Sai do espelho!” (“stop blocking the mirror”) at me in the toilets and physically pushed me to one side.
HIT: The sound system was actually pretty good and Liam played nice music.
MISS: The guy who, right after telling me about his girlfriend in Berlin, squeezed my ass and shouted “WHAT’S YOUR ORIENTATION?” at me in front of his (also presumably straight) friend. My orientation is getting as far away as possible from you, thanks. This was my cue to leave.
Fandango @ Mirari
HIT: Hearing Mr Master’s ‘A Dog In The Night’ as I walked into the party, the equivalent of a warm blanket and a cup of tea after the previous party.
HIT: I can’t remember how much a beer was but I’m pretty sure it was less than 4€.
MISS: The sound system seemed nice (it looked the same or similar to the one at the OC) but for some reason it was lacking some substantial body feel. I wonder if this is because of noise restrictions.
HIT: Mark and Dave from Fandango played fun and funky house and broken stuff on a mixture of vinyl and digital, accessible but interesting and good to dance to. The crowd seemed friendly and responsive, but I had a date with an empty dancefloor...
DJ Caring @ Lux Frágil
HIT: THE WHOLE DAMN THING. As I’ve mentioned on previous occasions, there are few things better than arriving at Lux’s disco at 1am and having the whole damn dancefloor to yourself while one of your friends plays amazing music. That was Friday night to a tee. DJ Caring played jazz, dub, dreamy electro, wonky bass, moody house and Peverelist's 'Pulse IV', inexorably ramping up the energy ahead of Verraco. What made it extra special was I never got stuck in that ‘slap’ conundrum that’s been on my mind recently (here and here) — her selections were always unexpected enough to keep my mind interested, and the pacing and mixing had enough momentum to kept my body active. THIS is how you warm up a room, I kept thinking to myself.
MISS: Verraco coming on and instantly playing pretty basic big-room 4/4 tracks that I might have enjoyed in another context, but following DJ Caring sounded positively plodding. It felt like he just hadn't been listening. What a shame.
SATURDAY
Just Look Paradise @ 8 Marvila
MISS: The DJs on when we arrived were playing very basic tunes – timeless vocals (Aretha Franklin, Marvin Gaye, Björk) slapped on generic techy loops, perfunctory rushes and drops. It didn’t bode well, musically speaking.
HIT: The aforementioned DJs playing some version of ‘Spectrum’ by Calvin Harris + Florence & The Machine towards the end of their set, making me wish they’d just played that kind of banger all along.
MISS: A beer was 5€, a G&T was 12€ and a cocktail was 14€, plus 2€ for the cup, which could only be refunded at one particular spot at the back bar. We'd very generously been given guestlist tickets so dropping 30€ on drinks wasn't quite as painful as it could have been, but it was still pretty painful.
MISS: A 60€ backstage area including a big plinth behind the booth where all the VIPs could go and dance and be seen by the peasants out front. (NB I am aware that this kind of model is perhaps a necessary evil for a production of this size, but that doesn’t make it any less cringe.)
HIT: The big Funktion 1 stacks actually sounded pretty good given the sheer volume and shape of the space. The music was quite concentrated towards the front of the dancefloor but that had the benefit of drawing people forwards and creating a good vibe.
HIT: It wasn't just dudes. The promoters' intention was for it to be a women-focussed event for International Womens' Day and they succeeded. The hot girls and gays had come out in force.
HIT: Lola Herself taking the stage to give us her best chairography just as Paula Tape came on — and absolutely nailing it.
HIT: Paula Tape also doing her bit following the previous DJs by playing music that had some substance to it, while still keeping it accessible enough to work with that crowd in that space.
MISS: Sadly Paramida didn’t make the party so Budino was moved to the closing slot. This meant I missed most of her set because I went up to Outra Cena, which is on the first floor of the same building. But the bits of Budino's set I heard while taking breathers on the upstairs balcony sounded pretty great. Lots of drums.
The OC
MISS: The bunch of 7 or so Italian dudes getting aggy when turned away at the door.
HIT: The door staff politely turning away the bunch of 7 or so aggy Italian dudes.
HIT: Mama Tehrani killing it on This Side with bass and techno. Spot on selection, slick mixing and meticulously controlled energy to warm up for Caroline Lethô.
MISS: Mamma Tehrani's headtorch, which may have been an interesting fashion choice but in my opinion distracted from the cool lighting effect of the enclosed OC booth (described here).
HIT: Caroline Lethô letting us have it with her acid and techno liveset.
MISS: The liveset being a bit too loud for me.
HIT: The OC crowd actually being pretty considerate when navigating the corridor of doom on This Side.
MISS: My taxi driver home listening, on full volume, to an Archie Hamilton set from Creamfields last year featuring Nyra's 'People Of The World', a track I could quite happily never hear again for the rest of my life. Sadly, we all know that's not going to happen.