The Comics Curmudgeon

Metapost: Surprisingly timed COTW

$ · October 28, 2021

Your COTW is early this week but do not be alarmed! It is due to an Unavoidable Schedule Thing and the rest of our publishing schedule will proceed as...

How DARE you reduce Pierre to a mere "and company"

$ · October 28, 2021

Mary Worth, 10/28/21 Wilbur! ... And Company? sounds like a mid-'80s sitcom that would be the retooled version of Wilbur! with most of the cast replaced and...

Would love to get an update where Wilbur gets really into Instagram stories

$ · October 27, 2021

Mary Worth, 10/27/21 I hate to ever use the phrase "I would respect Wilbur more" so let's just say that I would respect Wilbur a very small albeit still...

Wait, Mysta got a cool bodyguard outfit and I missed it somehow?

$ · October 26, 2021

Dennis the Menace, 10/26/21 [sputtering indignantly] Martha! You completely misunderstand me! Why, I wasn't planning on slipping this loathsome tyke a...

Meltdown Monday

$ · October 25, 2021

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 10/25/21 Do ... do the good folks of Hootin' Holler not know about air conditioning? The low-key single most important...

Sam was actually banned from the coffee place because he kept telling them "funny" names to write on the cup

$ · October 24, 2021

Judge Parker, 10/24/21 OK, I just want to establish a few facts here. The reason Abbey is so upset is that, now that the mayor is publicly accusing her of...

Saturday quickies

$ · October 23, 2021

Daddy Daze, 10/23/21 Looks like the Daddy Daze daddy died doing what he loved: projecting his weird esoteric internal monologue onto the nonsensical babbling...

Metapost: Hey, real quick: COTW

$ · October 22, 2021

Ka-blam! It’s your comment of the week: "Sorry, the only QR Dagwood recognizes is 'Quiznos Reuben.’” --Pozzo Ka-POW! It’s your runners up: "The Hootin'...

How far are you YOU willing to go to celebrate Halloween like it's meant to be celebrated?

$ · October 22, 2021

Gasoline Alley, 10/22/21 So Gasoline Alley is meandering along with one of its typically shambolic plots about a park ranger's kids (the same ones who had to...

"@realMarkTrail" was somehow already taken

$ · October 21, 2021

Mary Worth, 10/21/21 You ever get a terrifying moment of clarity and insight into a situation that you wish you really knew no details about whatsoever? That...

It's not just their horns that are locked together ... it's also their hearts

$ · October 20, 2021

The Lockhorns, 10/20/21 If you’re reading this blog, I assume you’ve dedicated at least a little bit of your brain space to the question of why Leroy and...

Wilbur has definitely ordered this restaurant's trademark "Royale With Cheese"

$ · October 19, 2021

Gil Thorp, 10/19/21 Much as I make fun of Gil Thorp, I do think it puts in slightly more of an effort at keeping up with trends young people might be into...

The movie made people LESS aware of breast cancer, somehow

$ · October 18, 2021

Funky Winkerbean, 10/18/21 You don't read Funky Winkerbean every day as long as I have without becoming a connoisseur of the various textures of suffering...

"Love is a con, son, never forget that"

$ · October 17, 2021

Dustin, 10/17/21 I sincerely respect the second panel here, in which Dustin's mom, having briefly attempted and failed to engage her husband about the...

Meals for heels

$ · October 16, 2021

Funky Winkerbean, 10/16/21 “Gosh,” literally dozens of you are wondering, “Whatever happened with Holly after she broke her ankle?” Well, she had to have...

Metapost: Do you like pina coladas? And COTWs in the rain?

$ · October 15, 2021

There’s no escape from this week’s comment of the week: "Yes, when two people start dating, if those two people have dogs, every activity -- nay, every...

Friday quickies

$ · October 15, 2021

Family Circus, 10/15/21 Wow, this one is pretty tough! Obviously it’s totally believable that Jeffy has managed to tragically injure himself due to his own...

Mostly speaking of facial expressions

$ · October 14, 2021

Dick Tracy, 10/14/21 Say, remember a few weeks ago, when Dick seemed to grudgingly agree that a free press is an important element in society and gave an...

Warlike Wednesday

$ · October 13, 2021

Mark Trail, 10/13/21 Interesting, interesting, it seems that despite my taunting Mark may have fought in a war after all. Or ... did he? He does seem quite...

Tuesday quickies

$ · October 12, 2021

Pluggers, 10/12/21 After years of discussing pluggers, I still don’t fully have a handle on every nuanced characteristic of pluggerdom, but honestly “there...

Leroy is enjoying flatbread for Indigenous Peoples' Day

$ · October 11, 2021

Blondie, 10/11/21 Is it just me, or does Lou look a little downbeat in that last panel? "I thought he'd say that," he's thinking to himself. "But a guy can...

Griff had BETTER be working for Rene the art forger, that's all I have to say

$ · October 10, 2021

Panel from Slylock Fox, 10/10/21 "Gosh," you're probably thinking, "I'm not sure what this fish photography session has to do with Slylock's usual job," and...

Depressing Saturday

$ · October 9, 2021

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 10/9/21 We all know that Snuffy Smith lives by the simple and brutal code of Hootin’ Holler, where clan feuds are passed down...

Metapost: Of the many comments, this is the top one (of the week)

$ · October 8, 2021

Title says it all, folks. Our of all the comments I read, this made me guffaw the most heartily: "You have to admit, if anyone is going to understand a scam...

Friday is for regrets

$ · October 8, 2021

Mary Worth, 10/8/21 Yes, it’s true: when you see someone that you ended up dumping because they got mad at your cat for ruining your singalongs, and somehow...

Mr. Beasely absolutely knows what he's doing here

$ · October 7, 2021

Blondie, 10/7/21 This is a perfectly sweet little strip and I’m sorry but I can’t stop thinking about the fact that famous binge eater Dagwood Bumstead is...

Sophie will eventually end up behind bars in 2039 or thereabouts

$ · October 6, 2021

Mary Worth, 10/6/21 “Bonjour, mes amis! Eet ees your old friend Pierre here, and today I find myself in a conundrum that would baffle even my countryman Jean...

Mostly manimal Tuesday

$ · October 5, 2021

Hi and Lois, 10/5/21 I'm not sure when, strictly speaking, we can say that untucked shirts came into fashion, but I'm going to say that it's been ... pretty...

Wilbur keeps meaning to Google "dogs what do they like" but keeps getting distracted

$ · October 4, 2021

Beetle Bailey, 10/4/21 I’m reasonably sure that if a soldier were running away from his commanding officer, who intended to brutally beat him, and was live-...

I certainly hope that Leroy doesn't know that guy and has dropped this line with zero context

$ · October 3, 2021

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 10/3/21 For a brief moment, Snuffy realizes that he’s harvesting worms that he’ll use to catch fish that he’ll presumably...

Saturday is for distasteful dudes

$ · October 2, 2021

Mary Worth, 10/2/21 [At the wedding] “So she said to me, ‘Is that your Frenchie?’” [leers grotesquely, everyone is kind of uncomfortable] “And I said ‘Yes....

Death, music, dogs, the future death of dogs: Today's comics have it all

$ · October 1, 2021

Mary Worth, 10/1/21 “Ah, mes amis! I realize I have not been keeping you up to date about my adventures with Weelbur. Je suis désolé! You see, what happened...

Can't wait for the lightning to finish her off

$ · September 30, 2021

Dick Tracy, 9/30/21 One thing I've always respected about Dick Tracy is that it would be easy to portray Diet Smith as an eccentric but helpful inventor...

Wednesday quickies

$ · September 29, 2021

Beetle Bailey, 9/29/21 BEETLE BAILEYS WHERE SARGE ASSAULTS BEETLE AND POUNDS HIM INTO A PILE OF GOO: Goofy, fun, cartoonish, the whole family can enjoy them...

I certainly hope he throws his tie over the lamp, right next to the one that's already there

$ · September 28, 2021

Shoe, 9/28/21 The obvious version of this joke would have the Professor deliver his first line looking at his desk at work, or maybe in his home office. But...

"Moolah" is actually the name of the hottest new cryptocurrency in the Blondieverse

$ · September 27, 2021

Mary Worth, 9/27/21 "Bonjour, mes amis! Eet ees I, Pierre, narrating my new life with zees Weelbur character! Many Americans like to make big jokes about zee...

DUHHHNNNN DUNH DUHN DUHN DUHN DUHHHNNNNNN

$ · September 26, 2021

Six Chix, 9/26/21 Wait, isn't the Phantom of the Opera's whole deal that he lives in the opera house full time, mostly in a lair in the basement, and he...

"Zees one, I hear he is easy to trick, no?"

$ · September 25, 2021

Dick Tracy, 9/25/21 Oh, huh, I guess the guy in the Ace of Spades outfit isn't actually the first guy to wear the Ace of Spades outfit, and that apparently...

Metapost: Comments? Of the week? In THIS economy?

$ · September 24, 2021

olks, it’s COTW time! "'Have you ever unironically used the phrase chick magnet?’ is not a question that appears on animal adoption applications, but I'm...

This is a Pierre stan account now

$ · September 24, 2021

Mary Worth, 9/24/21 God damn, look at him. Look at that adorable little smooshed face! Obviously I’m not talking about Wilbur, obviously, how dare you, I’m...

A bad day for nerds

$ · September 23, 2021

Beetle Bailey, 9/23/21 Gourmet, as I'm sure we all remember, stopped publication in 2009. Plato may subscribe to Fine Food, surely a much lesser imitation of...

Did his body cannibalize all his cartilage to survive in hibernation?

$ · September 22, 2021

Between Friends, 9/22/21 I've been reading and very occasionally commenting on Between Friends for a while now, and I absolutely get and accept that the...

"I'm SINGLE and ready for my dog to TINKLE on my ex's couch, for revenge!"

$ · September 21, 2021

Dustin, 9/21/22 A thing about doing a comic strip every day for years and years is that keeping up with whatever “high concept” you used to sell the thing in...

Monday's for the dogs

$ · September 20, 2021

Mary Worth, 9/20/21 Oh my god, everybody, it's really happening, where by "it" I specifically mean that Wilbur is going to go to the animal shelter to get a...

Sunday is for grandparents

$ · September 19, 2021

Crankshaft, 9/19/21 Oh, hey, remember how Max and Hannah’s business/passion project, the Valentine Theater, went out of business during the COVID lockdowns,...

They didn't even give Alexander's band a dumb name

$ · September 18, 2021

Blondie, 9/18/21 A strip like Blondie exists in a sort of eternal present, its world changing almost imperceptibly slowly over time to stay vaguely...

Metapost: F-R-I-I-I-D-A-Y (is for COTW)

$ · September 17, 2021

Roll on into the weekend with your hilarious comment of the week! "As usual, the best part of this gag is the lengths that Leroy has gone to make it work....

No armadillos were harmed in the making of these jokes (on my part anyway)

$ · September 17, 2021

Hi and Lois, 9/17/21 Do teen boys still, in the year 2021, lie around their bedrooms, decorated with Stones and Led Zep posters, and talk about how bands...

Froggie went a TEMPTIN'

$ · September 16, 2021

Gasoline Alley, 9/16/21 OK, I am going back on what I said before: I am going to briefly recap the current Gasoline Alley plot (this little girl spent a long...

Third-degree Wednesday

$ · September 15, 2021

Gil Thorp, 9/15/21 [clears throat] [extremely Beavis from Beavis and Butt-Head voice] FIRE! FIRE! FIRE! FIRE! FIRE! FIRE! FIRE! FIRE! FIRE! [takes a long,...