Mary Worth, 5/23/22

This upcoming storyline can’t possibly be about Dawn and what’s-his-face, the Star Wars nerd whose name the narration box can’t even be bothered to remember so I’m definitely not looking it up, because they’re boring losers. The way Mary’s looking straight at us in the first panel seems like a challenge: which character will have their brain baked by the summer sun until they finally allow themselves the awful experience of knowing another and being known in turn? Will it be Mary? Is Mary going to see if she can make 2022 “hot Mary summer” and finally fall in love? And how will Dr. Jeff fit into the picture? Will she at least have the decency to break up with him first, like the time she had a dalliance with a guy who she cruised at his own mother’s funeral? Or will she just keep him completely in the dark, like that time she went to New York and romanced a Broadway legend? I for one am, predictably, excited to find out.

Beetle Bailey, 5/23/22