BTS: My Dinner With André Midnight Madness
A Newsletter of Humorous Writing
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Today Luke talks about his piece Audience Participation Cues for the My Dinner With André Midnight Madness Screening, and how it was improved by a pre-publication note from a McSweeney’s editor. After that, we’ve got a couple of recommendations of things we’ve been into lately: a good soup recipe, a new comedy biography, and a 1980s arthouse classic.
Behind the Scenes: Audience Participation Cues for the My Dinner With André Midnight Madness Screening
After submitting what I thought was the final draft of this piece (the draft you’ll find below), I got an unusual and uncommon kind of acceptance email from Chris Monks, the editor of McSweeney’s Internet Tendency. Chris said that he really liked the piece, but suggested that I cut everything except the “Audience Participation” section and tweak the title accordingly.
I was more than happy to make these edits—not just because it meant an acceptance, but because as soon as I got that note, I knew it was the right thing to do. Though there are jokes I still like in the sections I cut, I think the piece is stronger and punchier without them. I killed my darlings, and it worked!
In the first paragraph I spent a lot of time laying out the premise and making the Rocky Horror connection for the reader. The final version does a lot less hand-holding, and trusts the title to do the work of setting up the premise.
The second paragraph basically only has two jokes in it, about George Grassfield and The Parade of Wallace Shawns. I suppose I might have been able to rework them so that they’d fit in the “audience participation” section—but why go to all that trouble for a George Grassfield joke?
And while I particularly like the André Gregory multiverse joke in the final paragraph, it and many of the other gags feel like they belong in different pieces. They’re related to My Dinner With André, sure, but they aren’t related to a raucous audience participation screening of the film.
(By the way, dear reader, if you think “André Gregory multiverse” has the juice to be its own piece, please write in and let me know and I’ll get right on it.)
A lesson I took from this experience is that if you have a list in the middle of your piece, bookended by a few paragraphs, very often that list is the real heart of the piece, and you may be able to get away with cutting everything around it. (Though sometimes you might still need a short—and I mean SHORT—intro paragraph to set things up.)
And so, without further ado, the “extended cut,” with its original title, of Audience Participation Cues for the My Dinner With André Midnight Madness Screening. (And don’t forget to compare it to the final published version.)
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A Guide to My Dinner With André Midnight Madness
Thank you for buying tickets to The Green Cardigan Company’s weekly screening of the cult classic film My Dinner With André, featuring live performances, costumes, and audience participation! We founded The Green Cardigan Company because we got bored with midnight screenings of The Rocky Horror Picture Show and because we are My Dinner With André FANATICS. We’re thrilled to be able to get up in front of the screen and act out all our favorite parts—like the part where André and Wally order quail, and the part where they talk about Brecht. We also provide plenty of opportunities for you to get in on the fun. Below are some tips to help you get the most out of the MDWAMM experience!
Costumes
Costumes are not required, but they are encouraged. While there are only three main characters (Wally, André, and The Waiter--duh!), that doesn’t mean that you are limited to just three costumes. For example: George Grassfield never appears on-screen, so use your imagination to come up with a creative George Grassfield costume! To answer a question we get a lot: Yes, it is very likely that George Grassfield wore fishnet stockings and/or a cape. And if you come as Wally, you will have the chance to participate in our grand finale, The Parade of Wallace Shawns: At the very end, when Wally is riding home in a cab, lost in his thoughts and memories, all our wonderful Wallys jump up on stage and do a kick line.
Audience Participation
These are the cues for you to get in on the action! The props you will need are in bold.
-When Wally talks about how he went to the stationary store, toss your ENVELOPES into the air.
-Whenever there is a reaction shot of Wally looking perplexed or skeptical, shout, “Huh.”
-Leaf through your ISSUE OF THE SURREALIST MAGAZINE “MINOTAUR” whenever there is a discussion of uncanny coincidences.
-When André tells the story of his attempt to workshop a production of The Little Prince, and how he found himself eating sand in the Sahara desert with a Buddhist monk, eat your SAND.
-Throw a BANANA at the screen every time André mentions his wife Chiquita.
-When the conversation turns to the anaesthetizing effects of the comforts of modern life and how they prevent us from engaging with reality, switch on your ELECTRIC BLANKET and get cozy.
-Cast a disgusted glance at your FLAG EMBLAZONED WITH TIBETAN SWASTIKA as often as you see fit.
-When André and Wally discuss the lamentable state of the theater and wonder if it’s possible to create a theatrical experience that would shake people out of their complacency, ask yourself: Is attending this screening/performance of My Dinner With André making you less complacent, or does it allow you to wrap yourself in yet another protective layer of ironic detachment? Is endlessly reenacting My Dinner With André a way for members of The Green Cardigan Company to hide behind a mask of performance and avoid exposing who we really are? Are we really saying anything with this show, or is it just an excuse for people to get drunk and dress up on a Friday night?
-Treat yourself to a nice AMARETTO when Wally orders an after-dinner drink.
-When André says, “The closer you come to another human being, the more completely mysterious and unreachable that person becomes”, turn to other members of the audience and ponder whether it is possible to truly know another human being. Then spray the people around you with SILLY STRING and GLITTER.
Miscellaneous Notes
If you enjoy the MDWAMM experience, you may also want to check out The Green Cardigan Company’s My Dinner With André fan fiction tumblr, “More Dinners With André.” In our latest story, André Gregory from My Dinner With André teams up with André Gregory from Vanya on 42nd Street to foil a plot that threatens the entire André Gregory Multiverse. You can also sign up for our newsletter to get all the latest My Dinner With André news and rumors. (Is Robert Pattinson attached to play The Waiter in an upcoming reboot!?) Finally, because of complaints, we are now warning ticketholders in advance: If you sit in the first three rows, you will get wet.
Some Recommendations From James and Luke
James recommends making some cool summer gazpacho. I’ve tried a few recipes over the years, but this is my favorite — the straining at the end is a little finicky but well worth it. I like spice, so I double the hot pepper, and I also like to add a red bell pepper for color and brightness. And if you want to up the presentation and texture, dice some of the onion, pepper, and cucumber and quick pickle it in some vinegar with a pinch of salt and sugar — topping the gazpacho with those tart crunchers and some olive oil steps it up a lot! Highly recommend not only serving this in a bowl with bread, but also pouring yourself a little glass to sip around the apartment.
James also recommends the new book, Miss May Does Not Exist by Carrie Courogen. Elaine May needs little introduction (though this New Yorker article/review is a good rundown) and Courogen has written a thoroughly entertaining deep dive into May’s life and work. I’m only partway through the book, but so far I’ve found it to be fascinating — it’s a unique look at an era of Hollywood and how an obsessive and exacting writer and director navigated it. It’s excellent reading for writers and comedy fans.
Luke, perhaps unsurprisingly, recommends My Dinner With André. It’s a great movie! I know a lot of people feel intimidated by its reputation or are skeptical of its premise: How can you possibly sit through a whole movie that’s just two people talking? The first time I put it on, I was wary too, but within minutes I was completely captivated. While it may be highbrow, it is not just arthouse homework. Give it a shot—particularly if you’re interested in theater, care about what it means to lead the life of an artist, or have ever had an odd experience reconnecting with someone you haven’t seen in a while.
See you next week!
@lukevburns & @jamesfolta
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