DIRECT TO VIDEO

March 30, 2026

DTV - Nothing Doing no. 64

p1: Autumn is leaving the bathroom.
p2: A visage of God appears before Autumn. To the untrained eye, God resembles a milk carton. God: AUTUMN WINTERS. BEHOLD YOUR GOD.
p3: Autumn beholds their god. Autumn: Wow, the real God! Are you appearing in a familiar form so that my mortal mind can comprehend you? G: No. Now listen
p4: God floats ominously, showing off the cute cow face on their front. G: You have been chosen to spread an important message. One only you can share. For you-- and only you-- have discovered… the true way to wipe.
p5: Autumn points at themselves cautiously. A: Wait, you mean… I’m the only person who does it like that…? G, off-panel: Correct
p6: Autumn starts flipping out at the non-plussed God. A: In the whole world? What’s everybody else doing? I can-- I can adapt! Please, I have my whole life ahead of me! G: You must not. You have a responsibility, Autumn. You must set the world on the true path.
p7: Autumn contemplates the weight of being as God continues their commandments off-panel. G: Go forth, Autumn, and tell everyone of your special technique. Friends. Family. Coworkers. Tell them all how you wipe, before it is too late. You God commands it, Autumn. Go now. Go. Go. Go — Nothing Doing no. 64

OK THAT’S ALL GOODBYE!!!

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