Hollywood Hotline - Week of June 5, 2025
HOLLYWOOD HOTLINE Archives
Howdy Hotliners,
[President Bill Pullman]: “Because today! Today we celebrate our Two Dumb Motherfuckers Fighting Day!” I’m sure we’ve all seen today’s Elon Musk tweets about the US President being in the Epstein Files. MOUNTAINHEAD (2025) just recently dropped on HBO-Max and was a total misfire. Writer/director Jesse Armstrong (SUCCESSION 2018-2022) should’ve cast hideous non-trained actors to play, Musk, Zuckerbgerg, Altman & Bezos, and the plot should’ve been what the bait-and-switch trailer promised, which was a bunch of billionaire assholes trapped in their glass castle watching the world burn right before their very eyes instead of the half-baked, under-cooked first draft film that we got that was hammy and bad.
TOP STORY:
ANORA Best Actress Winner Mikey Madison Playing Twins in Edgar Allan Poe Tale
“In THE MASK OF THE RED DEATH Madison will reportedly portray twin sisters in a world where a mad prince (Prince Prospero in the original 1842 short story) welcomes wealthy elites into his castle as plague spreads across the land. The long-lost twin, who lives among the lower class, enters the castle in what is an atmosphere of drugs, sex and game of thrones as Prospero throws a masquerade ball in seven rooms, each decorated with a different color. In the original short, a mysterious figure enters the castle disguised as a Red Death victim. Prospero dies after confronting the stranger, along with many other guests.”
Following in Vincent Price’s original 1964 film’s shoes. Should be cool.
Without further ado, let’s check the Hotline:
FUTURE FILMS:
Russell Crowe to Star as Unabomber Ted Kaczynski
Just put it in my veins.
Luca Guadagino to Direct Biopic on Sam Altman
Just don’t put in my veins. Luca needs to lounge. Take a breather buddy before you shoot yourself out.
Marty & Leo Producing OCEAN ELEVEN Writer’s Movie
“In the action thriller, a stranger happens upon a rust-belt city in decline, ruled by its criminal underworld. Using brain and brawn, he sows distrust and creates chaos, in order to dismantle the corrupt power structure. Verdi Productions and Ketchup Entertainment are financing, and casting is underway for an October production start in Rhode Island.”
Writer/Director Ted Griffin went to my grad school, AFI, and was one to study. His scripts always had a question or setup or hint at the bottom of each page thus forcing the reader to turn the page to find out the answer, payoff, or punchline. Literally. Page after page, he lured you and lead you to keep turning pages to find out more. Pretty fucking brilliant if you ask me.
Ang Lee Goes from BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN to OLD GOLD MOUNTAIN
“Three-time Oscar winner Ang Lee is coming on to direct OLD GOLD MOUNTAIN, an adaptation of C. Pam Zhang’s debut novel How Much of These Hills Is Gold. Hansol Jung penned the movie adaptation, which tells the journey of two orphaned immigrants.The 2020 novel follows Lucy and Sam, newly orphaned children of immigrants who suddenly are alone in a land that refutes their existence. Fleeing the threats of their western mining town, they set off to bury their father in the only way that will set them free from their past. Along the way, they encounter giant buffalo bones, tiger paw prints, the specter of a ravaged landscape as well as family secrets, sibling rivalry and glimpses of a different kind of future.”
Just as long as it’s better than GEMINI MAN (2019) I’m scaling this mountain
The RZA About to Feed Us ONE SPOON OF CHOCOLATE
The former Wu-Tang Legend wrote and directed an action thriller about “Shameik Moore’s former military convict ‘Unique’ arrives in a seemingly quiet Midwestern town after serving his country and his prison sentence for an assault he never committed to restart his life with his only surviving relative, Ramsey. Turns out the town’s racist sheriff and his violent posse share a gruesome secret about missing young Black men. When they set their sights on ‘Unique,’ the former soldier has no choice but to bring the fight to them. A Spoonful Of Sugar this is not.”
So REBEL RIDGE (2024) RZA-style. Put it in my mouth please! AAaaahh…
“MA SAID SHOOT YOU OUT (HUUH)!”
“Octavia Spencer is returning for a sequel to the 2019 revenge horror movie, MA.”
Full disclosure: I passed the fuck out while watching the original film fully reclined after eating a full meal complete with sugary alcoholic drinks at the AMC Dine-In Marina 6 in Marina Del Rey. But I vow to stay awake for this sequel!
PULP FICTION? No. SPLIT FICTION
“Developed by Hazelight Studios and powered by Unreal Engine, SPLIT FICITON centers on two writers — Mio Hudson and Zoe Foster — who become trapped inside a simulation created by Rader Publishing, a tech company that uses AI to mine authors’ ideas. The pair must work together to escape as they navigate through surreal environments, inspired by their respective genres of sci-fi and fantasy. Sydney Sweeney will play one of the two authors, though it’s presently unclear which one it will be.”
Sydney Sweeney attaching herself to multiple video game adaptations is a sign she’s chasing a paycheck as opposed to an Oscar. And who wouldn’t in this economy!?
Jason Momoa & Andy Samberg to Make Buddy Action Comedy in Hawaii
What if LETHAL WEAPON meets BROOKLYN NINE-NINE but set in Hawaii???
Care Bears Stare Their Care Bear Stare With Hollywood Flare
“Josh Greenbaum (WILL & HARPER 2024) will direct the movie Care Bears that is in early development at Warner Bros. A writer has not yet been announced for the film that has also not disclosed plot details.”
They better cast real bears. Because if they look anything like The Seven Dwarfs from SNOW WHITE (2025) I ain’t seeing it!
One of Three Jonas Brothers To Play One of Four KISS Band Members
All Actors Want to Be Rock Stars and All Rock Stars Want to Actors. But seriously, the Jonas Brothers and KISS cancel each other out.
Rachel Leigh Cook is Still All That And a Bag of Chips
“THE CHRISTMAS AFFAIR follows superstar sportscasters Natalie (Rachel Leigh Cook) and Gabe (Freddy Prinze Jr.), who form an unlikely alliance after their spouses are caught cheating weeks before Christmas. As holiday chaos and media attention mount, they begin to fall for each other. But is this just a rebound…or the start of a real Christmas romance?”
Wait? So not a SHE’S ALL THAT (1999) legacy sequel!? Slow clap. Bravo. The son of a bitch did it. I’m so old I read a script in 1999 called DATING RACHEL LEIGH COOK written by a guy from Idaho I worked with at the United Artist Valley Plaza 6 theater in NoHo. It was basically a THERE’S SOMETHING ABOUT MARY meets FATAL ATTRACTION. It wasn’t great.
Steven Spielberg’s Daughter’s Feature Film Debut Headed Straight to Tubi
“The movie takes place in a not-so-distant future where society contends with a pervasive virus that afflicts the entire adult population. After the deadly viral outbreak, a group of orphans flee in search of a new life, only to be taken hostage by a woman hiding a sinister secret. The horror-thriller is written by Paul Bertino.”
Could you imagine getting notes from your dad Spielberg? And it STILL goes to Tubi! Ouch. Tubi’s not known for their high-quality.
TRENDY TV:
Samuel L. Jackson Getting His Own YELLOWSTONE or TULSA KING Series Muthafuckas!
Taylor Sheridan spin-off blah blah blah
Sam Bankman Fried and Caroline Ellison Series Scamming Us Soon
“Julia Garner (OZARK) has closed her deal and will star opposite Anthony Boyle (HOUSE OF GUINNESS) in a new Netflix series about Sam Bankman-Fried and Caroline Ellison and the collapse of cryptocurrency exchange FTX, titled THE ALTRUISTS. Graham Moore (THE IMITATION GAME) and Jacqueline Hoyt (THE UNDERGROUND RAILROAD) will co-showrun and executive produce.”
Didn’t I just read that Caroline Ellison wants to make genius babies with Sam Altman or some other billionaire scammer? Or is that something I just made up? Hit me up in the DM’s if you got a source!
Ray Winstone Says IT’S A FUCKING LIBERTY To Be a Genuine Gangster
“Series is described as an epic crime family saga that tears through sixty years of London’s East End gangland history. The series is a turbulent rollercoaster following the story of a fierce matriarch’s rise to power in the 1970s through the murderous betrayals of an underworld/criminal network of bent cops, and scheming politicians – diving into numerous subplots spanning the post WWII era, the mainland IRA’s bombing campaigns, and 21st century repercussions.”
Sounds bloody epic, mate. Pour me a pint and slap me silly.
J.K. Simmons Says Not So Fucking Fast Ray Winstone!
“THE WESTIES is set in the early 1980s when the construction of the Jacob Javitz Convention Center on the Westies’ home turf in Hell’s Kitchen promises a financial windfall for the Irish-American organized crime gang. Despite being outnumbered 50-to-1 by the Five Families of the Italian mafia, the Westies’ legendary brutality and cunning have given them the leverage necessary to share the spoils through a fragile détente. But internal conflict between the brash younger generation and the old-school leadership threatens to set a match to this powder keg, which will sweep the Westies into the FBI’s ever-deepening investigation into the Italian mafia.”
What if SUCCESSION but Irish Mafia Motherfuckers? Pour me a bowl of Lucky Charms and beat me with the spoon.
BETTER CALL SAUL Co-Creator Cooking Up Another Show That I Probably Won’t Finish
“In DISINHERITED, an unexpected inheritance thrusts a pair of scrappy sisters into a world of generational wealth and long-buried crimes. It will star Victoria Pedretti (PONYBOI, YOU) and Kiera Allen (WATSON, THE GOOD DOCTOR).”
I couldn’t get into BETTER CALL SAUL (2015-2022) because it was too much of a slow burn that didn’t even come close to singeing me.
Brad Pitt & Channing Tatum Go VROOM VRROOOM for Isle of Mann Motorcycle Racing Series
“Sources tell Deadline that Chaning Tatum is attached to star in the film about the motorcycle races, which will be directed by Dog director Reid Carolin, who also wrote the script with Jason Keller and Bryan Johnson. Plot details remain vague, but the scope and history of the legendary race have all the notes of an epic feature film. Long before Formula 1, World Endurance and MotoGP, there was the Isle of Man TT. As the world’s oldest continuously running motorsport event, it remains a one-of-a-kind spectacle. With riders pushing man and machine to the edge at nearly 200 mph, the TT represents the pinnacle of sporting endeavor and the relentless pursuit of glory.”
I read a script about this very race for an actor once. One of the most dangerous and deadliest races in the world. The actor passed because he didn’t want to act on a bike, his face and big beautiful brown eyes under a motorcycle helmet visor. Go figure. Also, fuck Brad Pitt.
TANGY THEATER:
Jon Bernthal to Play Al Pacino Screaming “ATTICA! ATTICA!” on Stage
“Jon Bernthal and Ebon Moss-Bachrach will make their Broadway debuts next year in Dog Day Afternoon, a new play by Pulitzer Prize winner Stephen Adly Guirgis (Between Riverside and Crazy) based on the true crime that inspired Sidney Lumet’s Oscar-winning 1975 motion picture starring Al Pacino and John Cazale. The play is expected to open on Broadway in spring 2026. Additional casting was not disclosed.”
I love the original film. This is a solid adaptation. Sign me up to be a bank hostage audience member!
Will Ferrell Turning EUROVISION Comedy Movie into Stage Musical
I hated the movie. Then again I watched it in July of 2020, when nothing was funny. God speed to those that want to see this live.
COMING SOON:
FRANKENSTEIN - Did SoraAI or Veo3 make this???
A BIG BOLD BEAUTIFUL JOURNEY - Did Trump pick the title? What if the climax of ETERNAL SUNSHINE but whole movie?
KISS OF THE SPIDER WOMAN - The musical! My late mentor Leonard Schrader (1943-2006) adapted the original film and was nominated for an Oscar for it so I’m bias and can’t comment on this one
GOOD FORTUNE - Don’t act too hard Keanu, you might hurt yourself
THE HOME - Old folks home meets SAW? Starring Pete Davidson? Pass me the bong!
LURKER - What HURRY UP TOMORROW wishes it could’ve been. Eat your heart out The Weekend!
HALLOW ROAD - What if LOCKE (2013) but with two parents instead of one?
WICKED: FOR GOOD - Did SoraAI or Veo3 make this too???
BLACK PHONE 2 - Should’ve titled it BLACK PHONE:*69
THE THURSDAY MURDER CLUB - Not to be confused with ONLY MURDERS IN THE BUILDING
ALIEN: EARTH - Finally, they don’t have to wear space helmets! On Earth Every Neighbor Can Hear You Scream
THE WATERFRONT - What if OZARK but with Topher Grace instead of Jason Bateman?
SMOKE - Got a light?
WAKE UP DEAD MAN - Not a fan of Daniel Craig’s “accent” or “wig”
TALKING HEADS: PSYCHO KILLER - Official music video starring Saoirse Ronan
HEARTS OF DARKNESS: A FILMMAKER’S APOCALYPSE 4k - a must watch for all cinephiles
Let’s see how far the Musk v. Trump Showdown Goes. I’m hoping for screenshots and receipts but how do we trust anything in the Era of A.I.? Either way, I’m eating popcorn and laughing all the way to the bank —I mean food bank!
Until next week, Hotliners! Thanks for calling in.
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