Victoria: The Great British Bake Off (technically in America The Great British Baking Show because Pillsbury trademarked the concept of Bake Offs) is probably the show I love the most while also hating much of it. Is this a deranged way to start this newsletter? Probably!
At its core, the show is very good. A bunch of British people gather in a tent (why can't they have air conditioning!!) and bake. Many of the bakes are amazing, and I am always so hungry while watching. At least once a season, they will make some sort of terrifying British dish that no one outside of their cursed country would ever want to eat (the very first episode I ever watched involved meat pies that were literally leaking fat out of the edges....I don't want it!).
But, as time goes on, the show has become less interested in small, well-executed bakes, and more interested in spectacle. Why must every biscuit week (British people call cookies biscuits!) involve an untenable cookie sculpture, where the cookies must be hard for support? What if they just made the best cookies ever? Showstoppers are too showstopping and must be stopped.
Then there's the casting. Many of the former cast members are near and dear to my heart. I fully cried when Nadiya won. Ruby Tandoh is not only an amazing baker but also one of my favorite food writers in the whole world. Rahul and Liam and Kim-Joy and Briony and Chetna and Selasi always make me happy when they pop up on my Instagram feed. This season I am in love with Chigs and i want Giuseppe and Jurgen to adopt me. I love the Christmas episodes they have on Netflix, where former contestants return to face off in holiday-themed challenges. They are my close personal friends and I love them all and their quirky lives very much.
But at the same time, it's clear there's some sort of casting formula they use. There's always at least one youthful wunderkind, a very beautiful woman in her early 30s, two old people who seem confused at least some of the time, a man in his 50s who loves baking because it's "engineering," and a handful of people whose background is "ethnic" (people with backgrounds in Portugal, India, Spain, and Bangladesh have all filled this role before). And the people who use "ethnic" flavorings always have to deal with the white, old judges complaining about their spices being too strong! They deserve better than to be pigeon-holed like that.
Hayley, how do you feel about GBBO now?
Hayley: First of all, I'm so mad that you didn't fully commit and say that "Showstoppers are too showstopping and must be showstopped."
I kept trying to think back to when I got involved with GBBO, and I couldn't figure it out so naturally I searched my own tweets and it would appear that I started watching it in 2017. Isn't that wild? It doesn't feel like this show has been in my life for almost five years, but also we know time is even more fake now than it was before. I digress.
This year GBBO has really become special to me again in a way that had kind of waned, previously. On Fridays once I finish eating dinner, I take my dog for a long walk, then I make myself a mug of tea and give my dog a bone and we settle in on the sofa to watch the latest episode. I keep my phone in another room and really just settle in to actively watch the show and, dare I say, savor it? I am 100% all in on Jurgen this season, and when the judges criticize something he baked I frequently yell "TAKE IT BACK!" at my TV.
I rewatch this show a lot when I just need something calm in the background, and it sounds dumb but it really does feel like you get to hang out with your friends for a bit. The people are what make this show so special. All of the people you've mentioned are also personal favorites of mine, and sometimes I just wish Nadiya was back in the tent because I MISS HER. I only recently found out that Luis, who went to the final during the season with Richard and Nancy, died last year from esophageal cancer. It made me deeply sad!
Ok, now for my grievances. First up, let's talk about the time limits. I understand that they are trying to create compelling television and need some sort of urgency, but it's ridiculous. So frequently judges will say, "It needed a bit longer in the oven" when bread comes out underbaked. Or, icing has completely melted off the top of a cake because it had to get iced before it was fully cooled. So they knock off points for "not looking neat." I'm sorry, but this is an UNFAIR way to judge bakers! Normally they would never ice a cake until it's been cool, and they know how long bread has to bake for! But because of these stupid fucking time limits, they end up cutting corners and turning out subpar products. Why not let everyone have 6 hours to make something properly, then submit it for judging??? This season in particular has me aggravated, because Lizzie, who is a delight, keeps getting docked points for her bakes not having "finesse" EVEN THOUGH they taste good! She's running up against the clock for decorating every time because she is concentrating on the BAKE. Whew, I'm all worked up. Either they need to stop giving them time limits, or add an hour on to each challenge.
Victoria: Honestly, time limits on reality television have been driving me bananas lately. In last week's episode of Project Runway, a contestant said they ran out of time and the judges said, "That's fashion, baby." No it's literally not?? In no other world would you have two days to make a dress all by yourself??? And on the last season of Top Chef a chef I loved had a habit of forgetting to plate one component of every dish before time ran out, and the judges would get so mad. Like in a real restaurant she would have another minute!! That's not how restaurants work!!! Stop imposing your silly deadlines!!! But then reality TV becomes meaningless, etc.
The biggest issue with modern GBBO is the judging and hosting situation. To make this clear for our fellow Americans who might not have any knowledge of British television: the original GBBO aired on the BBC. The BBC is like our PBS in that it's publicly funded, but unlike our PBS in that it's a huge source of national pride and is pretty much universally loved (I am simplifying things, please don't come for me Brits). Being on the BBC (or The Beeb, if you wanna sound British) is part of what made Bake Off such a phenomenon. It's part of why, at the end of the show, the grand prize is...a lovely cake stand, instead of a million pounds or something. It added to its wholesomeness.
In 2015 and 2016, it was the most watched show in all of Britain! So the producers realized they were leaving money on the table by sticking with the BBC and decided to move to Channel 4. This is when things really started to go off the rails. Hosts Mel and Sue, two absolute comedic icons who could be funny without stealing the spotlight from the contestants and their bakes, refused to move. Judge Mary Berry, who, yes, is a very old white woman but I would say had the best attitude about trying cuisines she wasn't familiar with (she is very cute on the short-lived American version when she tries pimento cheese for the first time), also refused to move, out of loyalty to the Beeb.
That left us with Paul Hollywood, who was already the worst member of the cast. But Mary, Sue and Mel kept his ego in check, and usually the joke was on him. The same could not be true of Prue Leith (who replaced Mary and is...fine), and Noel Fielding and Sandi Toksvig, who in particular was so boring I could not remember her name at all and had to google. Noel (who was probably best known to Americans for his extremely transphobic sketch "Old Gregg") does a fine job and seems to get along with the contestants. Sandi got replaced by Matt Lucas, who I do not enjoy at all. And now my show that used to be dominated by women is dominated by men, and the vibe is very different and not enjoyable.
Yet! GBBO is still very good. I was an earlier adopter than you, Hayley. I remember watching one season with my friend Glenda in February 2016, but I know I had already seen quite a few seasons before then. I think the adjective that Americans would probably use to describe the show is "nice," and it is. If someone is running out of time and another contestant is done, they'll always come over and help. Everyone seems to really get along, and no one seems that bitter when they lose, or that smug when they win. But I also think the contestants (especially everyone who's not a thin, white British person) can experience a lot of harassment online that only gets reported out in the British press, so we're insulated from it.
Anyway, what are the bakes that live rent-free in your head? I think about this lion bread all the time:
Hayley: God, yes, everything that you bring up here is so good. What we're really missing with Mary Berry is someone to keep Paul in check, as you said. My favorite thing Mary would do was tell Paul, "I think you're being a bit harsh" because it's true, he is so picky. He believes himself to be the Simon Cowell of baked goods. Thank u, next.
I love the technical challenge, and this is honestly my favorite part of the show. It's truly a great way to test baking knowledge, and it's always fun to watch the process that people go through as they navigate a recipe that they are either completely unfamiliar with or just don't have a ton of experience with. It's compelling! My beef with the technical challenge is that, like the showstopper, it has gotten out of hand. Instead of focusing on the baking, they seem to focus much more on pulling some obscure Danish pastry from the 1700s out of their ass and being like "OK, make this!" The technical really shines when it is something deceptively simple, like an English muffin or a pretzel. I don't mind something slightly obscure every now and then, like when the technical challenge was to make hand-raised pies. That's fun! But if I have to watch another challenge using suet, I'm done.
The gentleness of this show is in fact what makes it "nice." There is no yelling or screaming, which you get in pretty much every other reality show and every cooking show. When someone is walking back to their station after being judged, and all the other contestants quietly say "Good job!" or "Well done!" it warms my goddamn heart. I think probably because this show does not have a cash prize at the end, and focuses so much more on the pride of being good at your craft, this creates a more supportive environment by nature. But I'm not saying there are not very lucrative incentives to becoming a finalist, winning, or even being a fan favorite — just look at the amount of cookbooks we have from GBBO alumni.
I think a lot about Frances' little vegetable canapes and Luis' cookie dragon all the time.
Victoria: The hand raised pies are also an iconic challenge to me!! I don’t mind when the bake is a little obscure, but this season they keep making them make dips or butter to go with their stuff, which seems silly?? I don’t care if they can make dip!
On the subject of the cookbooks, I got my friend Benjamina's book of simple but amazing cakes earlier this year and she has seemed extremely happy with the results of the bakes. Would be a great holiday gift for a baker near and dear to your heart, IMP.
One other thing that bothers me about not just GBBO but all competition reality show is when contestants obviously don’t have knowledge of the show? The iconic example of this is people using the ice cream machine on Chopped — you will NEVER have enough time, and you’d know that if you watched the show! I don’t know why GBBO contestants don’t just watch YouTube videos of people making every baked good they can think of in the lead up to the contest to prepare for the technical. And no one ever remembers that Paul HATES peanut butter, and then they use it and Paul hates it and it was all avoidable!!!
All that said, I am two episodes behind and cannot wait to catch up!
What Hayley Likes:
If you read last week's guest issue then you are already familiar with the lovely ladies of Book Club with J + V, who were nice enough to have Victoria and I on a special bonus episode of their podcast where we talked about the origin of this newsletter, our creative process, and some fun pop culture things as well.
Otherland candles are my new obsession; the Sriracha Rose candle is absolutely perfect and I would wager a perfect gift for literally anyone (including me).
I recently watched and enjoyed Morocco: Love in the time of War on Netflix. It's a Spanish soap opera set in the 1920s and the politics are bad (hello, colonialism) but the characters are great. If you watched this, I want to talk about it with you!!
What Victoria Likes:
I am currently reading Colm Toibin's The Magician and it's incredible. It's a deeply researched novel about the imagined life of famed novelist Thomas Mann, who lived in Germany until WWII when he and his family fled. He was also secretly gay and so were a lot of his kids? I didn't even know he was a real person until halfway through the book, so if your familiarity with him is literally zero you will still like this, I think.
Last weekend I saw my second post-lockdown movie in an actual movie theater and it was Spencer. I could not have loved it more.
This week, my friend Ariel Gitlin and I were on the We Stan Together podcast to talk all things Taylor Swift before Red (Taylor's Version) drops this weekend. In it I pitch a whole Taylor Swift jukebox musical, and you can listen to the playlist here. I was also on my friend Rachel's podcast You've Got Hanks to talk about why You've Got Mail is the best Tom Hanks movie. Check both out!!
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