Will we survive?
What can we do? It’s a question I come around to a lot. What is motivating me to act or think in a certain way?
Mind is a minefield.
I have to keep reminding myself to check what my motivation is for thinking or behaving in a certain way. The more I see the stories and beliefs I am made of, the more I have to take care. Am I reacting because of something I heard, something I believe and is that belief relevant to what’s happening?
For example, when I get some news that might not be what I want to hear, it’s a useful thing to stop and ask myself a few questions, it’s like slowing down time a little but, with practice it gets easier. Here’s what I try to do:
First of all I remind myself that when I am feeling fear or anger I am in survival mode and that is not a useful place from which to make a decision. When I am in fear or anger I am defensive, closed off and feeling under threat. Physically, I am in the primitive part of my brain, not the rational part. Also, parts my body (digestion, immune system, and certain organs) are slowing down to put more energy into escape (blood flow increasing, cortisol release, muscle tension, breathing more rapidly). I am all over the place, physically.
Secondly, I consider what I could be focusing on instead, that is useful to me in that moment. Something that allows me to get out of that threatened state. A nicer thought, a more positive conversation, thoughts about what I can do, rather than what I can’t, in this moment. Writing this is one of my ways. Right now I could be feeling anxiety about world events but instead I am doing this.
Knowing that I am getting myself clear of the threat state means that I will be healthier and make better choices. This also means resisting guilt and shame and what I might judge as societal expectations.
What is important? Action in this world is important but for me that action needs to come from a place where I am feeling OK. When I am motivated by anger or fear I burn out, I get frustrated and more angry and fearful.
What I’m learning is that this is physical, it’s biological. It’s not about what’s right and wrong. Survival mode seems to be what is causing so much dissent in this world. People being polarized, on edge, afraid of what’s coming. That is a state of mind, not the truth. It’s a biological process which has taken over, clouding clarity and judgement, something that is useless to us. Like trying to clean a window with a greasy rag.
So, sweep through that minefield first. Identify the location of the mines, identifying them with markers. And one by one you can start to clear that minefield.
I’m interested in your thoughts on this
www.endless-river.org