dear reader,

i have been wanting to write to you since yesterday but words just haven’t formed in the way that I would like. here’s an excerpt from a draft:

i type. i keep typing because i must. because i need to write. there is a prompt in a book i have, somewhere on the floor or on the wall or in a shelf and the prompt says: set aside an hour to write. you do not have to write but you can also not do anything else. and so i must type. i must write. i must continue on generating words on the page even when i do not know where those words will take me or why.

today, I was struck with some inspiration to write and tried but was again met with some resistance. i opened word- no good. i opened buttondown- no good. i opened obsidian- no good!

i felt all at once claustrophobic. the linear form of writing: top to bottom was squeezing me to the point of paralysis!

then I remembered the canvas feature in obsidian, and tried my hand at that. i’ve been in it around an hour and, while it feels really inspiring to have an infinite canvas to play with, I am having a hard time finding how to share it with you.

here’s a screenshot:

links referenced in the image:

• This newsletter by rayne fisher-quann about reading, how to read, how they read.

• This newsletter by Cody talking about Quilt Camp

• water gif

• illustration

and then here’s another from a previous experiment in the canvas feature of obsidian:

someone sent an email to me today and said they were sending it even though they didn’t have anything to say. i high-fived them in my mind- I know the feeling all too well.

today though, I feel like I have a lot to say and just haven’t quite found how to translate that in a way that feels authentic to the form not just the words. i will keep experimenting. i will keep learning. i am arriving, slowly but surely, to the place where my hands can shape the clay into a sculpture. except the clay is something else all together. what is it, actually? don’t know… we’ll find out what that is together because it’s just more fun that way.

recent reads (fiction)

• finished slewfoot by brom. review/reaction hopefully coming soon. spoiler alert: 5 stars.

• started, may finish tonight: the haar by david sodergren

• continuing with: the face of another by kōbō abe

i’ve just realized writing this that all my recent reads are written by men.. that may be the most consecutive male author reads i’ve had in years. huh.

are you reading anything horror related? let me know. i’m looking for more recs for spoopy season (best season).

a random note or musing from last week:

i think ill start calling my vault the digital swamp. swamps are transitionary environments because they hold both land and water.

a quote i’d like to share

from this essay that resonated with me deeply:

“I change my surroundings, my tools, my intentions. I have no goal, no purpose. I float. Sometimes I feel bad for myself to be so untethered — always a stranger or a visitor. […] Every business, every project needs a wanderer. Who else to sniff out new things? To push beyond what works and embark on some new adventure?”

a couple of really cool websites you should check out that I added to my Inspiring Websites Note:

• https://wildflower.work/
• https://shen.land/

and i’ll leave you with this picture of suki:

like most good things i simply found it,

ella nym