November 25, 2024

in case you need this

I wasn’t sure I was going to send out a newsletter this month, because I fell into the Pit of Despair the first few weeks of November for obvious reasons.

I do think it’s important to let yourself wallow in the Pit of Despair for a bit on occasion, when the world is on fire and then something happens that makes it pretty certain it’s going to get even worse. if you don’t wallow and rest for a bit, it’s a good bet your body will eventually force you to. from about 2016 to 2021, I’d sail along for months, feeling a lot better than I probably should’ve, only to suddenly break down for days at a time. undoubtedly it’d be better if I let myself Feel My Feelings to avoid the inevitable breakdown, but unfortunately I suck at that, so occasional breakdowns it is.

so I spent the first few weeks of November indulging a breakdown.

on the whole, however, I don’t think despair does much good. despair can cause paralysis and inaction, which is, like, the opposite of what’s needed to make things better (even when—maybe especially when—it feels impossible to make things better).

I don’t know that I can do much to make things better. I’m one person. I don’t have much money. I’m queer and neurodivergent and disabled, and sometimes it’s a struggle just to get through daily life even when the world isn’t throwing curve balls left and right.

but I can write books about a better world. I can exist authentically in a world that increasingly doesn’t want me to. I can share information about good things that are happening, and about things people can do to help, and I can do some of those things myself. I can make myself a safe space for others.

in case you need it, here are some things I keep in a desktop folder labeled “junk drawer” for when I’m in the Pit of Despair.

and in case none of those posts do it for you, here’s a possum I doodled for a friend based on a different doodle we’d seen of not-a-possum.

(this is also a valid way to deal with the Pit of Despair btw.)

until next time 🧡