Well, hello, and welcome to this week’s edition of the eCommercer.

With Thanksgiving landing this week — and Black Friday right behind it — I wanted to take a moment to dig into something that often gets overshadowed by all the noise of the sales, the ads, and the dashboards: the simple power of saying thank you. Not the automated kind that shows up because a system told it to, but the kind that reminds customers they’re more than an order number.

So in this week’s newsletter, I’m talking about gratitude as a genuine growth driver — how it shows up in real businesses, why it has such a big impact on loyalty, and the small shifts that can turn everyday touchpoints into meaningful moments. There’s also a free Gratitude Audit you can use to map out exactly where appreciation can make the biggest difference in your customer journey.

Have a great week, wherever you are in the world.

Until next time,

This Week’s Episode of the eCommerce Podcast →

The Power of Simply Saying “Thank You”

Happy Thanksgiving — even from this side of the pond.

Thanksgiving isn’t something we really do here in the UK, which I’ve always thought was a bit of a shame. The idea of having a day set aside simply to pause and acknowledge what you’re grateful for is actually a pretty good one. And funnily enough, it always lands right when the eCommerce world is gearing up for the most relentlessly transactional few days of the year. While families in the US are slowing down and gathering around tables, we’re refreshing dashboards and preparing for Black Friday and Cyber Monday — four days where everything becomes about numbers, conversions, and how quickly you can move product.

Now, don’t get me wrong — I love the energy of Black Friday. It’s fun, it’s fast, and for a lot of businesses it really can change the shape of the year. But the contrast is interesting, isn’t it? A holiday built around gratitude landing right next to a weekend built around urgency. And it got me thinking that in all the noise and chaos of this week, am I actually remembering to be thankful for the people behind the orders? Not the revenue, but the people.

Because the brands that win over time aren’t just the ones with the sharpest discount. They’re the ones that take a moment — even a quick one — to appreciate the customers who choose them when they don’t have to.

Automated Gratitude Isn’t Real Gratitude

If you’ve ever been to Barburrito, you’ll know they give you your tenth burrito free. It’s a loyalty thing. It works, it’s clever, and there’s nothing wrong with it. But when that free burrito appears, I don’t feel particularly grateful. I’ve bought the previous nine, so it feels like part of the deal. If I didn’t get it, I’d probably complain.

Years ago, Emirates upgraded me to First Class completely at random, just as a thank you for flying with them. No points, no “you’ve unlocked this tier”, no clever automation — someone simply decided to do something nice.

Same concept on paper — a freebie — but emotionally the two couldn’t have been more different. One felt earned; the other felt like someone had actually noticed me. And that difference matters more than most people realise.

Have We Overcomplicated Something Simple?

In eCommerce we spend an enormous amount of time thinking about loyalty ladders, points, tiers, VIP structures, discount logic, reward programs, all the rest of it. And none of that is bad. But sometimes I wonder if we’re so busy engineering clever systems that we’ve forgotten the human bit.

I’ve been reading a lot of research recently — proper behavioural psychology and business case studies — and the numbers are pretty striking. Companies that express genuine appreciation outperform competitors by 23%. And a 5% improvement in retention can increase profitability by up to 75%. Gratitude isn’t fluffy. It’s commercial. It just happens to be warm as well.

But most of us only think about it when a holiday reminds us to. What would it look like if gratitude wasn’t a seasonal prompt, but part of how your business operated every day?

The Gratitude Spectrum

Here’s how I think about it:

Level 1: No Appreciation. This is the default for most brands most of the time — especially during Black Friday. Functional, efficient, transactional, and forgettable.

Level 2: Automated Appreciation. Loyalty points. Automated thank-you emails. Birthday discounts. “Buy nine, get the tenth free.” Better than nothing, but predictable. And because it’s predictable, the emotional impact fades.

Level 3: Personal Gratitude. The handwritten note, the unexpected kindness, the message you didn’t need to send but chose to anyway. It’s not expensive, but it’s human — and that’s why it works.

What Happened When We Built Gratitude Into a Real Business

In one of our beauty businesses, we decided to bring gratitude right into the centre of how we worked. Not as a tactic — as a culture. We started including handwritten notes in parcels. If someone ordered multiple times, we’d reach out personally and thank them. We set up something called the SMOC budget — Sexy Moments of Customer Service — where each team member had £50 they could use however they liked to surprise a customer. It could be a small gift, a sample, an upgrade, or something thoughtful in the packaging. Every now and again I’d write a note myself and pop in my personal email address.

What stood out wasn’t just the way customers reacted, but the way the team did. Once people had permission to create these small moments, they naturally started noticing names on orders and adding personal touches without being told. Gratitude stopped being something we “did” and became something we were. And you could feel it.

Over the next 18 months, revenue increased by 20%, our repeat purchase rate rose above 40%, and overall customer sentiment shifted in a really meaningful way. Not because of any clever funnel — simply because people felt appreciated.

How to Do Gratitude Without Making It Awkward

The key thing to remember is that gratitude works when it feels human. If everything is automated, customers see it as part of the transaction. There’s no lift. But when something feels deliberate — when it feels like someone chose to do it — that’s when it lands.

A few practical places to think about:

Your thank-you page. Almost everyone who buys sees it, yet most brands treat it like admin. A simple 10-second thank-you video recorded on your phone is more impactful than anything automated.

Your shipping notification. It’s one of the most-opened emails you’ll ever send. Add a single warm line from a real human. It changes the tone instantly.

Your packaging. A handwritten line, a small card, a tiny gesture — people remember this stuff.

Your team’s freedom. Give them permission to be kind without needing sign-off. You’ll be surprised how naturally it comes.

Spotlighting customers. Not in a corporate way — simply acknowledging someone who’s been with you for a while makes a big difference.

These things aren’t costly. They just require a shift in attention.

Why This Matters More Than Ever During Black Friday

Black Friday is noisy. Everyone is shouting. Everyone is promoting. Everyone is fighting for the same clicks and the same customers. But people don’t remember noise — they remember feeling seen.

Gratitude taps into the parts of the brain responsible for reward, bonding, and trust. Customers who feel appreciated don’t shop based purely on price. They come back because of how you treated them after they bought.

In a week where almost every business is focused on the transaction, showing actual appreciation is one of the simplest ways to stand out.

A Simple Thanksgiving Challenge

You’re busy this week. I get it. So here’s something incredibly doable:

Think of three customers — by name — and send them a two-sentence thank-you message. No discount code. No upsell. No agenda. Just thanks.

See how that feels. Then see what happens when you do it again next week.

Small things compound.

Want Something Practical to Help?

I’ve put together a simple tool called the The Gratitude Audit. It maps out every customer interaction and helps you see where genuine gratitude can be added — plus examples from three different kinds of businesses and templates that don’t sound like they were written by a corporate robot.

It’s completely free. No funnel. Nothing hidden. Just genuinely useful.

Freebie of the Month →

The Gratitude Audit

Map every interaction your customers have with your business and discover where you're missing opportunities to show genuine appreciation. This free audit includes a simple template, worked examples from three different e-commerce businesses, and ready-to-use templates for handwritten notes, thank you emails, and shipping notifications - everything you need to start turning one-time buyers into repeat customers through authentic gratitude.

Find out more →

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