Classical music marketing and hell (not related)

Okay, so I think it’s very cool that COVID tests are a thing: thank you science for creating little easy-to-use kits that I can use at home to confirm that I likely do not have COVID.

But, science? A tiny suggestion? Maybe you can get on making an even better test where, if my result comes back negative for COVID, it tells me what is actually wrong with me. (“Hooray, you don’t have COVID, and the reason you feel like crap is because you’re stressed and you didn’t sleep well last night,” for example.)

I realize this might be hard for you, science, but I believe in you and, more importantly, I am very bad at figuring out at any given point why I feel unwell and I desperately need you to tell me.