How to Succeed in Graduate School With Actually Trying (Part 1)
I see many incoming graduate students asking for advice on Twitter, and I am here to give you the real deal. (Turns chair backward and straddles it). A lot of the official advice is not helpful and is way too general. Even more, I’ll stretch it out over a week. I can’t blow your mind in one sitting. So take my advice, or don’t. I think I’ve done pretty well for myself so far. “Graduate School” is a social construct and means different things to different people. I also am extremely privileged and more prepared in life to face challenges. . I'm also in a humanities interdisciplinary field, and I know different fields need different advice. I get it. Take what you will and ignore what won't work for you (which really sums up all my graduate school advice)
Graduate school is supposed to be fun. You get to hang out with like-minded people and learn for a (small) living. It’s something only a select few experience. I do not mean to dismiss the rampant bigotry and unhealthy relationships formed and recognize that I have privileges, but don’t fall into the culture of suffering. Celebrate the good. It’s cool to be enthusiastic. Peer pressure remains, and the desire to fit in never goes away. And peer pressure says you have to perform suffering.
If you are a younger graduate student, do not clique up with other people your age and dismiss the older students. The older students have life experiences and look for community, even if they are “old, married and have kids.” I'm not just saying this because I am an "old" graduate student.
Don't clique up with just your cohort. Get to know students ahead of you in the program. They can probably give you social support and literal support, like notes and old assignments. (Not to copy obviously, but to show examples.)
When you don’t do the reading, it doesn’t just affect you. The grad seminar experience depends on the whole class. When someone doesn’t do the work and runs their mouth as they did, it helps no one and wastes people’s time. To counter this, ask the person in the class, “can you refer to the part of the text you are referring to? I want to make sure I understand.” It's petty but hey, so is pretending you've read when you haven't.
With that said, be strategic in your reading. Go with the 1/3 rule- read 1/3 of the material closely and deconstruct and annotate. This will be your expertise when you get to class. Then, read another 1/3 well enough to discuss, but don’t agonize. Skim the last third to get the main point.
Use secondary sources if you don’t understand the material. For example, read book reviews and watch youtube videos. It’s not cheating.
If you don’t understand something, say, “I don’t understand.” It won’t kill you. If you are embarrassed to ask, you shouldn’t be there. Why would you waste this time learning something you already know?
Warning: you are going to gossip. It’s inevitable. Gossip is not nasty; it’s actually good for a community. However, if someone is willing to gossip with you, you can bet they are willing to gossip about you to someone else.
Also: faculty also gossip about students. If they gossip about other students with you, then they are gossiping about you to other students. There’s nothing you can do but accept this and choose your confidants wisely.
Choosing your dissertation advisor on their working style and interpersonal skills is more important than their research area and expertise.
Resist the urge to talk about how busy and tired you are. Are you really busy, or do you manage your time poorly? Especially if you are going to post publicly about all the tv you are watching. Instead, live your best life and show other people. If it really is an issue, seek the resources available to you. Don't be ashamed to deal with depression, but don't share everything with everyone.
Do not talk about the students you teach on social media. Not only may they see it, but it makes you look like a lousy teacher. If you are posting about it, maybe you are a lousy teacher. Maybe the problem is you.