the slow and unyielding march of time | episode 34
we stopped at our fave local coffee shop this morning on our way to the subway; the barista asked us what we were up to today. “oh, going to the Brooklyn Botanic Garden to check out the cherry blossoms.” the barista looked up sharply and exclaimed, “oh! that’s awesome! i was thinking of doing that!”
this is everyone’s reaction about the cherry blossoms — we all have had the cherry blossom tracker up on our phone browsers, waiting for the first weekend where there are enough in bloom to make it really feel like spring.
the weekend is finally here; there’s still a nip in the air, enough so that i was glad i wore a beanie. but it’s bright and warm in the sunshine, and while the Cherry Esplanade isn’t blooming yet, there were plenty of beautiful blossoms like the weeping Higan cherry (sorry, i didn’t take very many pictures!) around the edges and in the Japanese garden. there’s no better way to spend a sunny, spring morning than sticking my face into gorgeous cherry blossoms, magnolias, and hycanthia, so happy to be outside and breathing in their floral aromas.
flowers are somewhat predictable — the BBG website notes that the weeping Higan cherrys tend to blossom first, for instance — and yet it’s still a miracle every year when the frozen earth thaws and the daffodils and tulips and magnolias all push their way out of the ground or previously-barren trees. even the prebloom trees are a wonder; you can see the little buds, currently green and clutching themselves tightly, preparing to unfurl and put on a show.
my body and brain feel like that — it’s hard to be alive, sometimes, during a long, dark, depressing winter, but ever so slowly i’ve been loosening up, preparing myself for release. gosh, what a wonder spring is.
debris
i was reading my lovely friend Paul’s newsletter and found myself nodding along to his description of the cyclical nature of tendencies — it’s quite annoying that every late winter, i get into a depressive slump and as soon as it gets slightly nice again have to remind myself that biking and weight lifting make me feel good. very happy to be at the turn of that cycle, and biking and lifting and feeling alive again.
i’m always terrified when one of my loved ones is giving birth because it’s, uh, a dangerous medical procedure, and maternal mortality rates have skyrocketed in the US, so i’m overjoyed to tell everyone that my sister had a baby a few weeks ago, and that she and the bb are both doing well. Midge is a premie, so she is the tiniest little wizard, and we already love her so much.
i started replaying Breath of the Wild on my switch during the bad winter months, and am happy to report that i have finally beaten it. it’s a really beautiful game, honestly, still holds up since it’s ancient release date in 2017. David pointed out that i’m done just in time for the new Zelda game, Tears of the Kingdom, to come out. i … am hoping to selectively forget about that until it’s winter time again.
Shadae has been recommending Ghosts — both the BBC and American version — for ages and i finally started the BBC one. it’s really great! sorry, Dae, for taking so long, i love it so much. highly recommend if you want a relatively sweet, very funny show about dead, bored people hanging around an old, decaying mansion finally getting what they’ve been waiting for — the chance to watch Friends and reality TV.
what i’ve been reading:
it’s been a long time since i wrote a newsletter and i’ve been kind of avoiding the world for the last month or so (i’m sure you all understand) so this section is longer than usual and be EXTREMELY fantasy heavy, because i didn’t really want to be here. (happy to be back.) buckle up!
shout out to Gita who recommended roughly half of these books??? you’ve got the best taste.
Finished:
The Municipalists by Seth Fried
I have zero recollection about why I put this book on hold; I had no idea what I was getting myself into. Henry is a weird loner who spends his days being the best stuffy government worker at the US Municipal Survey that he can be. Alongisde a fun AI friend, he’s tasked with investigating an attack on the HQ. As he is drawn into the mystery, he starts to find holes in the rigid framework he’s held his whole life. This sounds kind of boring, I know, but I don’t want to give away many details because I found it really funny and interesting and thoughtful. CW: explosions, gun violence
If You Could See the Sun by Ann Liang
Reading YA is such an exercise in restraint; you want the characters to just communicate, or make a less dense decision, but then you’re remember that they’re 16 or whatever and no one is skillful enough to make good decisions when they’re 16. Even within that context, however, I think Alice, the protagonist in Sun is making some really bone-headed moves. But she’s just discovered 1. that her parents don’t have enough money to pay tuition at the fancy international school she’s attending and 2. that she randomly turns invisible, so I guess her life is chaotic enough that I can excuse some missteps. CW: kidnapping
The Library at Mount Char by Scott Hawkins
Wow okay I picked this book up off this twitter thread (lots of interesting-sounding reads in there btw) and I didn’t love all of it (the first chapter is tough) but it’s by far one of the more unique books I’ve read lately. It’s full of deeply weird science, body (and other types of) horror, but the heart of it to me was about what we give up when we become laser-focused on a single ambition. It’s gory, it’s funny, and wraps up satisfyingly. CW: body horror, violence, suicide, murder
The Atlas Six by Olivie Blake
Okay I guess I’ve read too many magic school books! This one is my least favorite so far, although maybe I am just weary of the genre. It had some fun elements — dark academia, plotting, betrayal — but the main six characters were all kind of boring tropes, and there is a decent twist though it came a bit too late to revive my interest. (Will I still read the sequel? Probably.) CW: violence
Build Your House Around My Body by Violet Kupersmith
My friend went on a date; her date had stopped at the library ahead of time and brought the book along; the book was Build Your House Around My Body and she told me about it; and oh goodness, I’m so glad she did, because this was one of the better books I’ve read in a long, long time. Set in Vietnam, it’s got a multi generational cast of characters that all connect in interesting, convulted ways, it’s got ghosts, it’s got revenge, it’s got misanthropic, alienated women, it’s got a talking dog. It’s deeply weird and great — my only complaints are that it went on for a little too long, making it hard to keep all the characters and relationships in my head, and then it ended quite abruptly. cw: body horror, sexual violence
The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison
The second pick in my “banned book club,” Bluest Eye is soooo beautifully written and so, so hard to read because the story is so upsetting. Back in HS, it may have been my first real introduction to the ways that racism cuts so deeply and can create such internalized self-hatred. Morrison gives us chapters in every character’s point of view, pushing us to empathize —not condone — even with those whose cruelty is impossible to fathom. CW: sexual violence, racism
Kitchen by Banana Yoshimoto (Author), Megan Backus (Translator)
A lovely, short narrative about grief and family, Kitchen is melancholy in some really resonant ways. CW: transphobia, violence
Super Adjacent by Crystal Cestari
Low stakes romp set in a world where having super powers is relatively common, and super hero teams are vetted and marketed to the public. Claire and Bridgette, the two protagonists, are not superheroes but are adjacent to the lifestyle. However, when the heroes they love and admire are kidnapped, they have to figure out how to be super in their own right.
The Claire Dewitt Series (books 1, 2, 3) by Sara Gran
Claire Dewitt is a detective — has been since her teens, when she and her friends discovered a rare handbook Détection written by the world’s most undervalued detective, Jacques Silette. Dewitt solves cases via arcane and often inscrutable methods — like all disciples of Silette is not in search of validation of her peers or clients, but of truth. Each book has its own, stand-alone mystery, which have answers that satisfy even when they upset, but each also brings Dewitt closer to uncovering the an underlying truth in her own life that has haunted her since she was a teen — the one case she’s never solved. I’m really underselling how interesting these books are, and I’m so thrilled that there is a fourth of this series coming out soon. CW: Addiction, suicide, murder, chronic illness
The Book of the Most Precious Substance by Sara Gran
Sara Gran seems fascinated by the power of books and the way that they change us. (See the Dewitt series above!) Lily used to be an up-and-coming novelist, but now lives a dull, pleasureless life where she sells rare books for a living and takes care of her husband who has a degenerative disease and cannot move or even talk. One day, someone asks her to find a very rare, mysterious book, a manual on sex magic that some say may be able to give the reader anything their heart desires. As Lily hunts for the book, she soon finds herself changing by both the hunt and the book itself. I don’t want to give away the ending, obviously, but I think Gran is asking some really interesting questions about what the things we want look like in theory and in practice. CW: Very graphic sex, some violence
The Power by Naomi Alderman
A book about teen girls across the world developing the power to zap people with their hands seems right up my alley, but for some reason it didn’t quite hit for me. The Power has a framing device of being set in the future, where women dominate in the way that men currently do. The bulk of the book is a speculative history of how everything came to be, starting in our present world where men are the dominant sex, the rise of “the power” and the chaos that ensues. I dunno. I like (and agree with) the idea that some/many women would actually be just as bad as men if we had the ability to physically dominate. The flip just felt a little bit too neat, maybe? Also there was a LOT of really horrifying violence in it. CW: sexual violence, extremely violence.
The Magicians Series, by Lev Grossman
One of the things that struck me the most about this series is just how misanthropic Quentin, the protagonist, is. He’s a whiny dude who is never happy with his life, even when he’s literally getting his dreams fulfilled. When things go wrong, usually because he can’t stop poking at an itch that becomes a wound, he’s quick to blame the circumstances and the people around him. There are easy Narnia and HP comparisons here — Quentin attends Brakebills Preparatory College of Magic, and is obsessed with Fillory, a magical land, but it’s definitely seedier and more intricate than either. In general, worth reading, but not top of the list. CW: Sexism, violence, the first book used the r-word twice.
okay, my friends! i hope you are all doing well and emerging from your winter slumber, if you also were taking them. love you all so much. talk soon!!!!
<3, davida