Happy Thursday y'all! We made it!!! We endured!!!!!!!

Let's get into it! So I finally sat down and watched Marry Me and hooo boy! That trailer was truly a masterpiece compared to what we got. Was it bad? I... think it depends on what you think of "bad." I knew we were in trouble when it was almost a two hour long film, but then half the trailer clips were done after the first twenty minutes. 

So FYI if you don't want to be spoiled for this movie (light spoilers!) or care about this movie at all, just skip to the bottom for recs or exit out! You've been warned!

So at the beginning of the film, we speed through their lives (except weirdly staying to focus on Owen Wilson as a dad and how he wants to connect more with his daughter), and then it's the BIG SHOW in the world's smallest concert hall. I swear you could see the back of hall with little no issue. I think my high school stage was bigger, which feels ODD as JLo -- I mean JLo's character is the biggest singer in the ~world~. 

Then the movie proceeds to begin with the first of many full song performances. Why do we need these songs? We don't! But my goodness, are we going to sit through ALL OF THEM! Half of them have no bearing on the plot! 

But then the movie happened proper and like......... it was....... it was certainly a movie, that it was!

Also as a reference, the movie was based off a web comic (which is awesome! I have no fault with this), but it felt like instead of taking the story and crafting it into a movie, that instead they took aspects of the web comic - which people can sit with longer than a movie - and just made those the scenes. It truly felt like you were reading chapter by chapter, which is a nice feeling when reading a book, and not so nice of a feeling when watching a movie. A lot of the dialogue felt off, the scenes felt jarring, and the pace was both a breakneck speed and so slow that everyone live-tweeting it just gave up after the first hour because there was a moment of everyone thinking "oh my GOD there's FIFTY MINUTES LEFT??"
 
JLo was cute! Owen Wilson did what Owen Wilson does best -- which if I'm being honest, I'm not sure what that is! The acting was aggressively fine! The dude from Game of Thrones who played the manager was actually a goddamn delight and probably the best part of the movie (and there's a whole article about how JLo selected him for the role which is a huge help to break him from the "best friend archetype of Game of Thrones").

But .... JLo and Owen Wilson had no chemistry....................... which was something we all kinda knew going into the movie but whew boy...................................... that made a one hour and fifty minute film feel like the length of the entire extended editions of the Lord of the Rings. Which actually is an unfair comparison, as all 12 hours of those movies speed through while you blink, and this one.... there was no speeding. 

But look. I knew what I was getting into, and did I have fun? At times! It's a great background music movie. Also there are songs! So many! Too many! Lord help us.

Other things I found funny/interesting:

• The way social media played into the movie - like having the instagram lives /be/ part of the movie was a clever idea! Got old real quick, but clever
• "AND DO YOU, SOME GUY, TAKE KAT TO BE YOUR WIFE." -- Best line in the trailer and thank god it stayed in.
• She was alerted that she was nominated for a Grammy...................... at like 3pm. Grammy noms are around 8:30am EST, I believe??
• She throws a rock into her house because she forgets where the key is/she has no idea???? and no one deals with the alarm because????????
• Actually, the whole subplot (if you can call it that) of JLo trying to not rely on her team and for Owen Wilson to get on social media is one of those feelings of like "oh yeah, this was a chapter of a webcomic." It's weird, and instead of being cute and quirky, it just feels incredibly try-hard. JLo forgets to put a lid on the blender she's using? Like................. it's certainly something? She has no idea how to run her house? Am I supposed to find this relatable, quirky, or...... funny?
• There's a scene where she's at a concert and Owen Wilson is watching and like..... it's being streamed to a laptop in high def, close up. WHO IS FILMING THIS? WHERE IS THIS STREAMING???
• The mathlete scene at the end when they LOSE made me laugh so hard I had to pause the movie. Like cute! Relatable! DEAL WITH REALITY KID: YOU LOST.

What a film. Goodness gracious. I DID IT. I GOT TO WATCH THAT GLORIOUS TRASH FIRE OF A MOVIE. And I had a glorious time livetweeting it and enjoying it with others. Do I recommend you watch? If you're not committed to fully sitting down and analyzing it, why not?

Also this is the second time I get to mention alleged actual cannibal Armie Hammer in my newsletter, but he was supposed to play the role that Owen Wilson is! I... don't know if that would've been better or worse?!! We can only speculate!!!

Recommendations!
 

• If you did not watch the Superbowl Halftime show, you should! Brought be right back to an age I will not say, lest I make people feel older than they are. But dang it was great. I had a moment of "can I do every line of Lose Yourself --" and then proceeded to scream/sing it so loudly, it was amazing my neighbors haven't filed a complaint. And yes, we needed so much more Mary J. Blige! Goodness, why have her if you're not going to let her fully express why we don't need the hateration nor holleration in this dancery!?
   
• Did you know the Oscars are...........this year? I was going to say soon, but I have legit no idea when. And I don't care! My film degree is crying. But! For the animated films, much of the nominated ones have uploaded their art books so you should definitely check it out! Here are Encanto's, and The Mitchells vs. The Machines (which is an INCREDIBLE movie, if you haven't seen it!) to get you started!
   
• You know how we all love regency romances, ala Bridgerton? No? You've never seen Bridgerton?? TOO BAD - cause NBC has the newest dating show, The Courtship, where "swiping is out, courting is in!" (I should be paid for this promotion!). But! What in the absolute heck is this? I'm not the biggest fan of regency at all, but this looks silly. If you're going to have a dating show with the regency, make it full! Dresses that look super uncomfortable! A hand touch being the only thing you might have going for you! What the HELL is happening? This looks like an absolute trash fire!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YES I will be watching!

Have a great weekend!!