Hooooo boy it has been a week. So if you're able to take a few minutes to chill with me, I'm honored. If you need to go like, scream at the sky instead, I would not judge you in the slightest.

Friends, let me tell you about two books that I talk about all the time when it comes to emotions and feelings and how to handle situations at work. 

If you follow me on Instagram (or heck, have an instagram), you've probably come across one of the drawings from @LizandMollie aka Mollie West Duffy and Liz Fosslien, two women who give work advice while also having cute art. What I like about them is that sometimes, especially with the rise of "fuck corporate work!" reels and tiktok, sometimes, I just want someone who not only makes me laugh about it, but also is like "hey, do you need actual advice that does not include punting your laptop into the ocean? Cause you're not alone in this!"

Their books, No Hard Feelings and Big Feelings, break down situations when having emotions is not only human, but important, and how to manage them. I really liked No Hard Feelings as it discusses how to handle emotions specifically while at work. I might have talked about it before (probably something about not stabbing a dumbass), but they have an entire section that talks about "your work will not love you back so it's okay if you're a little less passionate about it!" that seemed to wake me up from the rut I had been in.

In Big Feelings, their book which released last week, they talk about, well, big feelings. Especially now that we're in the midsts of a pandemic, there were a lot of emotions that I realized I was dealing with in unhealthy ways. And sometimes it is helpful to have a book, oh, I don't know, list bad tendencies them out in audiobook form while you're trying to walk and being called out six ways to Sunday! 

There are a lot of great chapters that discuss things like Burnout, Anger, Regret, Despair, and Perfectionism - a feeling that a lot of people brush off as "oh how is that a negative?" and buddy I can tell you, it is. But their books are pretty straight forward with true-to-life examples from themselves, and lots of quotes from their readers. They give great advice on how to handle Big Feelings or Work Feelings that never feel condescending. More like a friend you like to chat to finally sat down and was like "look buddy, but I need to talk to you about X thing and maybe we can work through it together."

Here in particular is an article about managing your anger at work and how anger can actually be productive. Apparently, back in the 2000s, Pixar intentionally recruited frustrated animators to work on a new film because he thought they were more likely to change things for the better. And then they made The Incredibles, which I think is an incredible film in itself so.

As many business books as I've read (which, disgustingly, is a lot) what I like about these books that separate them from business-y or self help-y books is that feeling that they've been through it. I know Charles Duhigg and James Clear figured out habit things in order to help themselves as well but like did they or did they analyze a situation and do it that way? Also I'm tired of listening to white men tbh. But with these, I enjoy reading/listening to them, I like the advice they give and the situations they reference and.... it feels good to have a variety of experiences to discuss when talking about such things.

I remember finding copies of No Hard Feelings on a take shelf at work (REMEMBER WHEN THOSE WERE A THING) and giving them to a few younger colleagues. Idk if they ever read them, but I hope they did. If I had a book like that when I started my professional career that told me not to put my whole self worth into my job, I'd probably be a little better off. 

Or not. Who knows! Either way, check out No Hard Feelings and Big Feelings by Mollie West Duffy and Liz Fosslien. I highly recommend it.

Onto some other recommendations!

• I barely could get this newsletter out as I've been wrapped up in Duolingo! I'm sure you know about the language learning app (with the fucking terrifying bird), but as I was looking up vocab, someone recommended to try the app on the desktop which... is amazing. *cough you can't lose points cough* Which technically takes away the gamification of it, but I've been learning Korean and you don't want to learn how many times I failed at the alphabet. But now! I can say a few simple phrases like 여우의 우유와 오이. Boom baby. (The fox's milk and cucumber.) If you join - let me know and we can be friends!
   
• If you're looking for an LGBT retelling of Sleeping Beauty, I would say look no further that the Malice duology. I just finished the series and it was quite lovely. Vicious, angry women, politics (?? which was fascinating), and a sweet slow romance. I really recommend!
   
• Everyone and their mother has watched Our Flag Means Death, and if you haven't and you're looking for a delightful romantic comedy that involves pirates that feels like a workplace comedy, please check it out!!

Have a good weekend y'all, and take in some sunshine! *checks weather to see it's going to pour* TAKE IN THE SUNSHINE TODAY PEOPLE!!!