✷greetings ✷

it's summer, y'all! this june as been a massive improvement over the trauma of last june (knock on wood). i spent the beginning of the month venturing out into the world and hanging out with lots of people i've never hung out with before (by a lot, i mean 3. i'm an introvert afterall). i got a little overwhelmed and pulled back, but i've been surprised at my ability to jump back into the world after being locked down for so long. i also tabled mold to gold flea market downtown. i was proud of myself for doing the thing, because i didn't know anyone going into it and it was first come, first served as far as spaces were concerned. it was chaotic but good. i forgot how much i enjoy tabling, even though i always need recovery time afterward. i maybe? might? eventually? put together a punk rock flea market with some help from a friend (realistically, more than one friend lol). it's an idea i've been kicking around, and i wrote a whole outline of how to set it up. 

but i digress! i was visited by a bee friend when i watered the garden the other day and i needed to tell someone. a cute little bumbly dude landed on my hand. i was startled at first, so i stopped what i was doing and held him up to some flowers, but he wasn't into it. he just sat there for a while, with me staring in wonder at him, until he felt it was time to fly away. it was lovely. it reminded me of how my dad used to pet bumble bees when i was a kid, as my younger brother and i watched in awe.

✷ zine news ✷

i’m not really working on anything new right now and i’m trying to feel okay about that. my time has been mostly taken up by shop duties, caring for the garden and doing leisurely things recently. i still have finishing touches to put on wanderer 7, but i have a feeling it’s gonna get sidelined in favor of summer fun. i'm stocking zines for antiquated future at the moment, because they’re stocking up for international zine month. i’m excited that they’ll be carrying more of my titles! i've also been very passively shopping around for bookstores that might wanna carry my how to support your non-binary family member zine, so lemme know if you have any leads (especially in lancaster or olympia).

✷ do diy ✷

do diy has been super active this month! patrons will be receiving a real site report for the first time in ages. i'm not thrilled about all the spring cleaning ahead of me, but i'm glad folks are submitting spaces (see a defunct spot? gimme a heads up!). my helper andy and i put together a google form for folks to use to submit spaces and other stuff. i was worried people were gonna hate it, but it seems to be going over well, and it's made my life a whole lot easier.

i still haven't been to any gigs since lockdown eased up, but i bought tickets to see cheekface in september, which is exciting!

✷ fucking hooray ✷

lately i’ve been interrogating my attachment wounds with fresh eyes. i'm reading polysecure by jessica fern atm and i realized i'm usually attracted to people with more avoidant attachment tendencies. i tend toward anxious attachment myself, and prefer to be direct about my feelings since i’m pretty sure i come off extremely platonic regardless of my intent. my proclamations usually send avoidant folks running for the hills, and i’m left wondering why no one will ever "pick me," so to speak. well, i just started seeing someone who i've been exchanging texts with for months, and let me tell you, it’s wild to hang out with someone who is just like, "duh, i like you!" instead of internally speculating and hoping for crumbs of validation. communication is so cool. i find myself having to remind my brain that it’s a good and healthy thing to not be chasing uninterested people (weird how brains work). maybe you can relate. this is all very new so i may eat my words, but if you catch me grinning like an idiot, this might be why.

at the risk of being a broken record, i cannot wait for crucial hangs with a good bud who is visiting in july! i sometimes can't believe that i haven't seen any of my east coast friends or family since 2019. i'm trying my best to make as much space as possible for FUN this summer! i hope everyone is faring okay during this shift (it's totally valid and okay if you're not! everything at your own pace).

love, alyssa

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