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When I am working through feelings of perfectionism, wanting to know how it all ends, a desire to get it right the first time, I do not wait for clarity or courage. I start anyways. I begin before I am ready. I charge forward, sword in hand, ready to get knocked off at any moment. I start anyways.
The hardest part of quilting is grabbing two pieces of fabric. It used to be threading my sewing machine, but now I always make sure to thread it when I am finished sewing, ready for the next time I have the willingness to sit down and sew two pieces of fabric to each other.
So now all that is left to do is grab two pieces of fabric. They aren’t the same length so I find myself already stressed out. Will I cut one to be smaller? Or will I start sewing them together and then cut them to be the same length after? My favorite part of quilting is when a quilt is finished but my second favorite part is picking up the first two pieces and starting. This is a sign to me that I am willing to be wrong, to make a mistake, to build my resilience of anti perfectionism.
To start is throw it all to the wind, the unpredictable air swirling around us, even with the most specific plan laid out for us to start is to surrender.
To start is to surrender
To start is to surrender
To start is to surrender
Yet I find myself again, not starting. Which in turn means I have a resistance to surrendering. Where will the quilt go? Where will it live? Who is the next quilt for? I find myself longing for a collection, a series, but why? For walls or for beds? For the motel I haven’t bought yet? The only truth is that if you don’t start sewing the first two pieces together you will never have a quilt.
I am staring at the last quilt I made and there was an ease to it because the squares had already been cut by someone else. The quilt before that I committed to sewing strips and starting there. Snipping and sipping. What is next though? Why do I suddenly find so much pressure in the simple act of taking two pieces of fabric and putting them together.
I will start anyways, even though I don’t know what it is for. Oh I simply hate to not know what something is for. The thing about not knowing what it is for is usually along the way it tells you. Or it was for nothing at all the whole time.
I am retiring from meaning making. Commitment to the anyways of beginning, of starting, of trying.
May you put the pieces together, trusting that once you start something always happens. May you listen to the call that comes from inside the house, perhaps the antidote to fear is not waiting to want to. Upon completion may you remember that no quilt top is finished, may you chop it up and rearrange it, may you cut anyways. May you start anyways, may you finish even if it does not feel complete.
A QUILT IS SOMETHING HUMAN
Starting this Saturday May 7 at 10am PST / 1pm EST
A Quilt is Something Human is an intimate four week course on Zoom where we will learn the basics of improvisational quilting through the art of starting over again and again until in our hands we have a blanket - and if you do not finish and have a blanket you will have all the tools and knowledge to be able to make your own
PATCHWORK
APPLIQUÉ
HISTORY
HAND QUILTING
MACHINE QUILTING
FINISHING
MUTUAL AID
ANTI PERFECTIONISM
SHOW AND TELL
You are encouraged to be available and present for all four classes - however if you have to miss one they WILL be recorded for you to watch at a later date! THIS CLASS HAS CLOSED CAPTIONS
No previous quilting or sewing experience required : just show up
There are two and three part payment plans for this class and scholarships for BIPOC students
PAYING ATTENTION TO
Really into Marian Hymns at the moment
RIP to country legend Naomi Judd, pictured here with Wynonna and my dad
FLEXIBLE OFFICE! Starts May 17 - with new DEEP WORK sessions
TESTIMONIAL : Flexible Office feels like a happy zoom beehive! I used flexible office to approach my big career goals and also to fold my laundry and I felt equally held and championed while doing both of those things. On the days where I didn't feel like sitting down to my tasks the idea of being in a warm social silly space was often the push I needed to show up.
My favorite books right now!
Following closely the detainment of WNBA all star Brittney Griner, while there doesn’t appear there is much action to be taken at the moment in getting her home safely, staying informed, up to date, and in prayer for her safe return home
New York Public Library Dance Fellowship - May 15 deadline
Earth Trauma’s pocket chain to make your wallet to belt loop situation as gay as possible
Jen Hewett’s fabric by the yard
A Quilt is Something Human alumni h.hiaasen :
10.
xo Mar
A portion of May’s paid subscriptions goes towards the National Harm Reduction Coalition
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